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Get Out of Your Own Way:

Overcoming Self-defeating Behavior
Front Cover
10 Reviews
Penguin, 1996 - 177 pages
Self-defeating behavior is the single most common reason that people seek psychotherapy. It is a poison, preventing us from achieving the love, success and happiness we want in our lives. And what really drives us crazy is feeling we have to change and not knowing how - or knowing how but being unable to stick with change. Get Out of Your Own Way is an antidote - it explains why we sabotage ourselves, going back to childhood origins of various behaviors. More important, it offers proven steps of action to transform behavior from self-defeating to life-enhancing.
With anecdotes and usable insights drawn from twenty years of psychiatric clinical practice, Dr. Mark Goulston shares ideas that have helped thousands of patients overcome pain, fear, and confusion - to approach life's challenges with dignity, wisdom, courage, and even humor. By encouraging you to reflect upon your behavior - and providing practical steps toward change that you can work into your everyday life - Get Out of Your Own Way shows you how to stop being your own worst enemy - and become your own best friend.
  

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Review: Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior

User Review  - Elizabeth Black - Goodreads

I was not impressed with this one. I think what he was going for was practical application to every day life, but the stand alone lessons seem nothing to do with one another and are too simplistic to address the deep roots from which self defeating behaviors stem. Read full review

Review: Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior

User Review  - Hard Knocks 101 - Goodreads

A no nonsense direct way to dealing with self -defeating behavior. Read full review

All 9 reviews »

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Selected pages

Contents

Chasing After Love and Approval From
1
Procrastinating
11
Waiting Until Its Too Late
21
Saying Yes When You Want to Say No
29
Assuming They Dont Want Anything
37
Playing It Safe
41
Always Having to Be Right
45
Focusing on What Your Partner Is Doing Wrong
49
Trying to Take Care of Everybody
100
Refusing to Play Games
104
Putting on an Act to Make a Good Impression
108
Being Envious of Others
113
Feeling Sorry for Yourself
117
Assuming the Hard Way Is the Right Way
122
Thinking Im Sorry Is Enough
126
Holding It All In
130

Putting up With Broken Promises
54
Trying to Make up While Youre Still Angry
59
Not Learning From Your Mistakes
63
Trying to Change Others
67
Rebelling Just for the Sake of Rebelling
71
Talking When Nobodys Listening
75
Pretending Youre Fine When Youre Not
79
Becoming Obsessive or Compulsive
83
Taking Things Too Personally
88
Acting Too Needy
92
Having Unrealistic Expectations
96
Quitting Too Soon
135
Letting Others Control Your Life
139
Leaving Too Much to Chance
143
Letting Fear Run Your Life
148
Not Moving on After a Loss
152
Not Getting Out When the Getting Is Good
156
Not Asking for What You Need
161
Giving Advice When They Want Something Else
166
Backing Down Because You Dont Feel Ready
171
Copyright

Common terms and phrases

able accept admit adult afraid ALEXANDER POPE anger angry avoid BEAT SELF-DEFEAT Becky become better BROKEN PROMISES child Columbo core of hate core of hurt create dangerous partners defeating defensive DORIS LESSING EDWIN ARLINGTON ROBINSON effort emotional empathy end up feeling envy example expect express father fear feel bad felt forgive FRANCIS BACON frustration getting give goal hold hope husband important keep kids know-it-all less look lose marriage Michael Landon mind mistake mother needy never OBSESSIVE OR COMPULSIVE obsessive-compulsive disorder okay OSCAR WILDE pain parents partner patients person play problem procrastinate promise-breakers RALPH WALDO EMERSON realize rebel relationship resent self-defeating behavior sense situation someone spouse stop sure TAKING ACTION talking tell therapist thought tion told trust turn Ty Cobb understand unneedy upset USABLE INSIGHT usually VICTOR FRANKL wife wrong

References to this book

From other books

Using Superheroes in Counseling and Play Therapy
Using Superheroes in Counseling and Play Therapy
Lawrence C. Rubin
No preview available - 2006

References from web pages

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Get out of your own way: recognize and overcome self-defeating behaviors in yourself and others from HR Magazine in Business provided free by Find Articles
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Author & Book Views On a Healthy Life! - BREAKING NEWS AND OPINION ...
Mark Goulston is the author of Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior, Get Out of Your Own Way at Work and PTSD for Dummies. ...
www.basilandspice.com/ display/ ShowJournal?moduleId=1070760& categoryId=167970

Dr. Mark Goulston
The Website of Dr. Mark Goulston. About Dr. Goulston • Executive Coaching • Blog • Talks and Workshops · Buy In Video • Subscribe to Usable Insights ...
www.markgoulston.com/

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Get Out of Your Own Way at Work - 读书网|dushu.com
国学/古籍 | 文学艺术 | 人文社科 | 经济管理 | 生活时尚 | 科学技术 | 教材教辅 | 少儿读物. 图书搜索：. 全部, ISBN, 书名, 作者, 丛编项, 出版社, 主题项, 简介...
www.dushu.com/ book/ 11796426/

Work & Career: Article - Want to Succeed in Your Career?
... management consultant specializing in psychological ergonomics, author of Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior ©1996, ...
www.selfhelpmagazine.com/ articles/ wf/ succeed.html

About the author (1996)

Mark Goulston, M.D., is a corporate consultant who works with executives, managers, and line workers to help them get out of their own way so they can realize the success that their skills, talents, and abilities deserve. His clients include Goldman Sachs, Merrill Lynch, GE, White & Case, Eli Lilly and Company, Disney, Kodak, and the FBI. He writes "The Leading Edge" column for Fast Company. He was selected as one of America's Top Psychiatrists for 2004-2005 by the Consumers' Research Council of America. Dr. Goulston is the author of Get Out of Your Own Way and Six Secrets of a Lasting Relationship.
Philip Goldberg, a novelist and screenwriter, has authored or coauthored sixteen books.

Bibliographic information

QR code for Get Out of Your Own Way
TitleGet Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-defeating Behavior
Perigee Series
AuthorsMark Goulston, M.D., Philip Goldberg
Editionreissue
PublisherPenguin, 1996
ISBN0399519904, 9780399519901
Length177 pages
  
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