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captive, held so long under the killing terrors of the law, and unmerciful usurpations and infernal affaults of the powers of darkness, set free and ma numitted by the Deliverer of God's elect.
An undone forlorn sinner, shut up under the power of unbelief, who awhile since would shun and Ay from God, if he knew how, for fear of his frowns, and the curse due for the breach of his law, now ready to shoot himself into heaven, and whimper and cry like a child till he be lodged in the bosom of God's love.
Oh, my soul! who could have thought of this, when the irons of the law's severity had pierced thee so deeply, and when the apprehensions lodged in thee of thy being a reprobate, and forsaken of God, delivered thee up to defperation ! the very portal or entrance into hell itself! Where am I? What is the matter? What am I doing? What such a one as I saved? Is it possible? Can it be? Am I not under a satanical dream or delusion? Lord help me to know if it be a delusion, and undeceive me.
Here I was at a stand for a little space; it was occasioned by my calling to mind what a deceitful enemy the devil is, and how near he can go in imitating the Spirit of God, in causing flashes of joy in the soul of an awakened finner, and thinking, at the same time, whether mine was not so.
The Spirit of Adoption, who began his good and blessed work in my soul, did not leave me in
this cloud; but by his own elucidating and heartsearching virtue and power, brings to my thoughts and consideration all the objections which either devil or carnal reason could possibly make against my being saved by Christ, and by manifesting the Father's decree and purpose concerning me in eternity, and laying open the nature and design of the covenant of grace, and the every way all-fufficiency of the Lord Jesus to go through with the work he hath undertaken for me.
He fully answered all objections, and confuted the false and sophistical reasonings brought in by Satan and corrupt reason against my being saved, as he most powerfully convinced me of sin, and the misery which thereby I brought upon myself; and that, when he disciplined me with bondage to fit me for the Great Physician, fo likewise, as the Spirit of Adoption, he as powerfully convinced me of that spotless and everlasting righteousness of the Mediator, God-man, by and for which I was justified in the person of my surety, when at his resurrection God the Father justified and acquitted him from all charge of fin, whereto he became liable and obnoxious when he struck hands with the Father as a surety for me, and the rest of the elect,
The twelve things here following he particularly assured me of, and that as fully and sensibly as ever I was sensible that I saw natural light or darkness. J. He assured me that I was one of that number
whom God the Father elected and chose to himself in Christ out of the corrupted mass of fallen mankind, and that before time began; ard that my name was recorded in heaven, in the Lamb's book of life.
2. He assured me that my fins and transgressions committed against the law and Majesty of heaven, were all laid to the score of Christ, by God the Father, and by him, as my vademony and surety, born and satisfied for. He made reconciliation for iniquity, and brought in everlajiing righteousness.
3. He assured me that the debt which I had contracted both in Adam, my natural and federal head, and in my own person, was fully paid and actually discharged by my sponsor and surety, Christ, by his obeying and keeping the law perfectly for me, and his bearing and undergoing in my nature the curse and wrath of God, to which by sin I became obnoxious, and thus redeemed me from all iniquity, and from the curse of the law, by being made a curfe for me.
4. He assured me that God the Father is fully satisfied with that obedience, active and passive, of his own Son, and that it is for the worth and merit of that obedience that God justifies and accepts, as pleasing to him, both me and the rest of his elect, for whom alone that obedience was performed; as it is written, In him shall all the feed of Ifrael be justified, and in him they Mall glory. 5: He assured me that all my sins, how many
and great foever, are frankly and freely forgiven and pardoned as if they had never been committed; and that not for any act done by me, whether believing on Christ, or repenting for fin, nor yet for the sorrows and miseries I underwent while under the spirit of bondage, or for any service to which I should be called while in a militant state, but for his own name and glory's fake, and on the account of what his Son, my mediator and surety, had done and suffered in
6. He assured me that God the Father loved me with a real and an endeared love before I was called out of a state of nature; and that the reason why he handled me so roughly by the spirit of bondage was, not because he hated me, as the devil and carnal reason suggested, or that he might in any measure satisfy his vindicative justice for my sins, that being done long before I had a personal being ; but that he might make me the more fensible how hateful fin is to him, being so contrary to his pure, spotless, and blessed nature, and so repugnant and contradictory to his holy, just, and most righteous law; as also so destructive to his elect, whom he so dearly loves; also that I might know, and become for ever sensible how unspeakably wretched and deplorable that state and condition is, into which by sin man hath brought himself, and out of which no created power could possibly save and deliver him, That I might for
ever hate and loathe sin as the worst of evils, and become for ever sensible of the greatness, goodness, love, mercy, wisdom, and the unconceivable and infinite all-sufficiency of the glorious and tremendous Jehovah, Father, Son, and blessed Spirit; who himself, without the counsel or help of creatures, hath contrived and found out such a way of restoring to his lost favour his elect and chosen in Christ, as neither they themselves nor the angels could ever think of. And finally, that by his so sharply handling me, a way may be made into my soul for the manifestation of his great and inexpressible love, wherewith he loves me in Chrift, to enter and make its abode for ever: and that, from the experience I have now gotten, both by God's wounding me by the spirit of bondage, and this healing and comforting me by the spirit of adoption, I might be fitted to speak experimentally both to the terrifying and awakening secure and presumptuous sinners; as also to heal and comfort instrumentally poor wounded and bleeding finners, when sinking into depths of defpondency and despair, out of which the out-stretched arm of God's grace and almightiness hath delivered and rescued
as St. Paul speaks, And whether we be afflicted, it is for your confolation and salvation. 2 Cor. i. 6.
7. He assured me that I am now in a justified, fanctified, and adopted state; the loft image of God being by his fanctifying operation recovered