Queen-Elizabeth, Michaelmas-day operation, it is the duty of the next gentleman to relieve her, certainly, but let him order the waiter to take it to a side table and carve it in quiet and in comfort. No man has a right to require any thing of a brother diner that will cause him to rise from his chair. When I see ladies and gentlemen laboring with moist brows and anxious faces over some terrific dish, to the destruction of their own enjoyment, and the promulgation of dismay in the minds of all around, while some halfdozen grinning waiters are idly looking on, I can scarcely help addressing the host in the words of the Chinese Mandarin, who was invited by Lord Macart ney to a ball, and after watching the evolutions of the dancers during a sultry evening, stepped quietly up to the Ambassador, and said, "Why do you not suffer your servants to do all this for you?"

XXV. When riding on horseback in company with a lady, eschew the cockney habit of placing your ani mal upon the off or right hand side of your companion's horse. It is the prevalent custom, I admit, but it is very wrong. Let us argue the positions-if you ride, as usual, with the lady on your left hand, the dear creature, if she wishes to speak to or look at you, must twist her poor little body into a painful posture, or screw her lovely throat into tortuosity. You also have the misery of knowing that she is speaking from you, instead of towards you; and if, in your eagerness to catch the charmer's words, you ride your nag too close to her palfrey, and bring the steeds in collision, a small jostle on the off side is more likely to unhorse her than a terrific thump upon the near side. The best rider may slip occasionally; and supposing that a stumbling nag causes you to knock XXIII. A male flirt is a more disgusting character your fond companion from her saddle, by bumping than a she coquette. The he animal is a thing against against her on the off or fashionable side, how splen nature, and deserves unmixed contempt. A young didly ridiculous you will appear when endeavoring and pretty girl is generally flattered into coquetry; to make an apology as you are picking her up. and we have no right to grumble at the practice of Again, by riding on the off side, you leave the lady's the sin we have ourselves conveyed. There is some-legs to the chance of rubbing against every vehicle thing delightful too in the airs of a young sunny you meet or attempt to pass-take, then, the proper thing, flirting with and domineering over the hearts situation on the near side, and protect her from the and habits of some half-dozen six-footed, whisker-faced rubs of the road. In this, the only eligible place, you fellows that is, when the coquetry is the natural have your good right arm at liberty to seize the lady's result of good spirits, and the joyousness of a young, bridle, should her animal prove refractory. I dislike uncontaminated mind, not the trick of a practised jilt—bringing forward instances from other nations, because but the male flirt, who devotes his attention to winning the maiden affections of a fond confiding girl, and, when her friends interfere, professes, with apparent surprise, that he meant nothing serious, leaving her to the agony of unrequited love-deserves to be turned loose amid a jury of disappointed spinsters. I know several handsome and accomplished young men, who hang over the temporary objects of their vampyre love with apparent sincerity of devotion, and after preying on their hearts, walk off unconcernedly to some other beauty of the hour, viewing the whole affair as a little innocent flirtation-although the fair one's blighted cheek and languid eye too plainly show the force of withering slight. I hate them all; and, like a true lover, would dare them to the death. I heard a good-looking fellow, a ladies' man, declare that he had tendered his attentions to no less than five young ladies at a watering place, and he had consecutively blarneyed them all into the belief that he was devotedly in love-" and doubtless," said he, "the poor, dear creatures all look forward to be the chosen she with whom I must enter the happy state, but they are all dy mistaken." I have despised the fellow ever since.

XXIV. Beware of large lobsters. They are coarse, strong, and indigestible, particularly those with incrustations or lumps upon the shell, which arise from excess of age. The male lobster has a narrower tail than the hen, and is preferable for the table; pick out a few, about six inches long; put them into a quart of boiling water, mixed with half a pint of Madeira; let them bubble for half an hour; mix them with a good white celery salad, and you will learn what a lobster really is.

a philosopher should always speak from the self-con-
viction attendant on experience; but a magister has &
right to certify the practice of his precepts by any popu
lar exemplar. A Frenchman would as soon think of
sitting on the same saddle with a lady, as of riding
on the off side-and the French are a polite and gal
lant people. It is an absurd and awkward habit, re-
pudiated by every European nation, and in vogue
with us because we have reversed the English cus-
tom of the road, and take to the right whenever they
turn to the left-but we have no more occasion to
change the sides of association than we have to alter
the stirrup side of the ladies' saddle, or to mount our
own horses right leg first, and countenance the tail. I
have heard one objection raised to riding on the near
and proper side of ladies, inasmuch as it was likely
to cause an entanglement of the spur on the right
foot with the flowing proportions of the lady's habit.
He must be a poor equestrian, indeed, who would
stick his heels into the skirts of a dress instead of the
sides of a horse-but I wish my pupils distinctly to
understand that the use of the spur in exercise or
pleasure rides has become entirely obsolete. In fox-
hunting, or indeed any field sports where leaping and
other violent efforts are required-in military manœu
vres, or long and painful journeys where extraordinary
exertions are expected from your equinines, the spur
is a necessary portion of your equipment; but when
merely taking a little saddle exercise, a gentleman
would as soon be seen riding with a crupper as with
spurs. The use of a persuader upon ordinary occa
sions is at once an acknowledgement that you know
not how to ride.

B.

OF THE EARLY MARTYRS.

There was a small grotto by the lake that wound before the old arched windows of the hall; a world of fine foliage was matted fantastically above and around it, so as to exclude every intruder but the kingfisher, who plunged, meteor-like, on his golden prey, and vanished in the shade before he was well seen; and an endless variety of woodbines leaped from branch to branch, swinging their dewy tendrils in the air, and showering fragrance upon the green moss beneath, or stealing round the rustic pinnacles, like garlands twined by Cupid for his favourite hidingplace. It was in this choice retreat that the Lady Sibyl chose to forget the world in which she was born, and imagine that for which she seemed created; and in this mood, without manifesting any particular symptoms of exhaustion, excepting that she had grown a little more pale and more slender, she continued for three whole years.

I WISH I could describe the young Lady Sibyl; she was rather tall than otherwise, and her head was carried with a toss of the prettiest pride I ever saw; in truth, there was a supernatural grace in her figure, by which she was in duty bound to be more lofty in her demeanor than other people. Her eyes were of a pure, dark hazel, and seemed to wander from the earth as though they were surprised how they happened to drop out of the skies; and the sweet, high, and mighty witchery that sported round her threatening lips inspired one with a wonderful disposition to fall down and worship. It was, of course, not to be expected that such a strangely gifted lady should be quite so easily contented with her cavaliers as those who were not gifted at all; and Sibyl, very properly, allowed it to be understood that she despised the whole race. She likewise allowed it to be understood that, the world being by no means good enough for her, she conceived the best society it afforded to be her own wilful cogi- On the third anniversary of her resolution-she tations; and that she meant to pass the whole of her knew it was the third, because the said resolution pretty life in solitude and meditation. People con-happened to have been made on the same day that jectured that she was in love, and too proud to show it; and Sibyl surmised that they were vastly impertiment, and by no means worth satisfying.

her wild cousin, who had earned for himself the title of Childe Wilful, chose for his departure to the wars -on the third anniversary, as on all other days, Sibyl

again tripped down the chase to live in paradise till | boy and girl flirtation a folly to be amended? And tea-time; but, not as on other days, the noble summer do I find you the same-excepting far more lovelysunset seemed to have stained her cheek with a kin- the same perverse being who would not have given dred hue. Ere she reached her wilderness, she looked her wayward prodigal for the most dismally sensible back again and again at the hall, slackened her pace lord of the creation? Often as I have feared, I have that it might not appear hurried, and gazed as long had a little comforter which told me you could not upon the swans and water lilies as though they really change. See, Sibyl, your miniature half given, half "occupied her thoughts. Meanwhile, the flower of the stolen, at our last parting-it has been my shield in fox-hunting chivalry were carousing with her father a dozen fights; has healed with its smile, as many in the banqueting-room, and flourishing their glasses wounds;-it has asked me if this was a brow whereon to her health. The most mighty and censorious dames to register deceit-if these were the lips to speak it— of the land were seen stalking up and down the ter- if these were the eyes-as I live, they are weeping race, as stately and as stiff as the peacocks clipped out even now!" of the yew-trees at either end of it. Sibyl seemed to have lost the faculty of despising thein, and was half afraid that her desertion would be thought strange. As she stood irresolute whether to go on or turn back, she was startled by a voice close by, and the blood leaped in a deeper crimson to her cheek.

She did not raise them from her bosom, but answered, with a smile of feigned mortification, that she thought it very impertinent to make such minute observations. "I, too, have had my comforter," she said, drawing the fellow-miniature from her bosom, and holding it playfully before his eyes;-"it has been "Sibyl! dear Sibyl!" it exclaimed, "wilt thou come, my shield against a dozen follies-it has warned me or must I fetch thee, before the whole posse of them?" to benefit by sad experience;-it has asked if this was Sibyl tossed her head and laughed; and with an the brow whereon to register any thing good-if these agitated look, which was meant to be indifferent, were the lips to speak it-if these were the eyes-as strolled carelessly into the shade, just in time to pre-I live, they are conceited even now!" vent the intruder from putting his threat in execution. He was a light, well-made cavalier, with black moustaches and ringlets, and a high-born eye and forehead, which could have looked almost as proud as Sibyl's. As for his accomplishments, the fine Frenchified slashing of his costume, and the courageous manner in which he assaulted a lady's hand, bespoke him a wonder.

But have you indeed kept my picture so close to your heart?"

And do you indeed think that your old rival, Sir Lubin of the Golden Dell, would have given me a farthing for it?"

"Did you ever try him?"

"Oh, Childe Wilful! can you change countenance at such a name even now? No; I did not try him, and (for you are a stranger and must be indulged,) I will tell you wherefore. I would not have given it him for his head; nor for as many of them as would have built a tower to yonder moon; and so now see

"And so, my gallant cousin," said Sibyl, with a voice which was a little out of breath, and with a feeble effort to extricate her fingers," and so you have brought your valor back to besiege my citadel again." Sweet arrogance!" is it not the day three thou-if you can contrive to be jealous of him;-nay, you sand years on which we parted; and did I not promise to be here at sunset ?"

"I believe you threatened me that you would. Pray, have you run away from battle to be as good as your word ?"

And pray, did you always consider it a threat, or did you tell me that this grotto should be your hermitage till my return?"

"And pray, for the third time, do not be inquisitive, and trouble yourself to let go my hand, and sit down on that seat over the way, and tell me what you have been doing these three days."

"I will, as you desire, take both your hands and the other half of your chair, and tell you, as you surmise, that I have been thinking of you till the thought became exceedingly troublesome: and now oblige me by telling me whether you are as proud as ever since

shall not touch it. Do you remember how often, when it pleased you to be moody, you threatened to take it from me?"

you lost your beauty, or whether you have ever mus-thing. When you went from hence, it was with a tered humility to drop a tear for the mad blood which I have shed in toiling to be worthy such a mighty

lady?"

college character, which was by no means likely to ingratiate you with reasonable people, whatever it may have done with other folks; and you must not

Sibyl laughed, and snatched away her hand from talk to my father of the treasured Sibyl till you are him to draw it across her eyes.

better acquainted with him. Talk of ploughs and politics as much as you please;-make it appear that now the wars are over, there is some chance of your turning your sword into a pruning hook, and yourself

into an accomplished 'squire;-and then-and then, I a plunge. It, moreover, left them ample opportunity alas! for the high-minded Sibyl!"

*

It was not long afterwards that Childe Wilful, to the great surprise of Sibyl, arrived at the hall in hot haste from foreign parts! He had always been a favorite for his liveliness, and was, indeed, almost as much liked as abused. The old lord took him by the hand, with a comical expression of countenance which seemed to inquire how much mischief he had done; and the old ladies thought him vastly improved by travel, and awfully like a great warrior.

The only persons to whom his presence was not likely to be strikingly agreeable, were a few roundshouldered suitors of Sibyl, who, in common with country squires in general, were largely gifted with the blessings of fleet horses and tardy wits. Amongst these stood pre-eminent, Sir Lubin of the Golden Dell. He was a tall man, with not a bad figure, and really a handsome face; though the dangerous tendency of the first was somewhat marred by peculiar ideas of the Graces; and the latter was perfectly innocuous, from an undue economy of expression. Altogether, Sir Lubin was a very fine camel: he was a man of much dignity, always preserving a haughty silence when he did not exactly know what to say, and very properly despising those whom he could not hope to outshine. Thus it was that the meeting between Sir Lubin and Childe Wilful was very similar to that between Ulysses and the ghost of Ajax.

Had this been all the mortification which the Childe was doomed to undergo, he might perhaps have contrived to bear with fortitude; but Sibyl had subjected him to the task of obtaining a good character, and his trials were insupportable.

In the first place, he had to tell stories of sacked cities and distressed virgins, at the tea-table, till he became popular enough with the maiden aunts to be three parts out of his mind; for Sibyl was all the time compelled to endure the homage of her other lovers. It is true that her keen wit could no more enter their double-blocked skulls, than the point of her needle could have penetrated the Macedonian phalanx; but then each villain fixed his eye upon her with all the abstracted expression of the bull's eye in a target, and seemed so abominably happy, that the sight was excruciating. Sometimes, too, Sir Lubin would muster brains to perceive that he was giving pain, and would do his best to increase it, by whispering in her ear, with a confidential sinile, some terrible nothing, for which he deserved to be exterminated; whilst, to mend the matter, the old ladies would remark upon the elegance of his manner, and hint that Sibyl was evidently coming to, because she seemed too happy to be scornful, and had lost all her taste for solitude. They would undoubtedly make a very handsome couple; and the Childe was appealed to whether he did not think that they would have a very fine family.

to negotiate with the aunts upon the arrangement of her plans for the next day, when he was still condemned to admire some new farm, or ride ten miles to rejoice with his host over a wonderful prize-bullock. Sometimes, too, the old lord would apologize for taking him away, by observing, that it was better to leave Sibyl to her lovers, for it was time that she should take up with some one of them, and the presence of third parties might abash her.

In the third place, when he retired to bed, to sum up all the pleasures of the day, it was never quite clear to him that Sibyl did not expose him to more disquietude than was absolutely necessary. It might indeed be proper that her attachment to him should not be too apparent till he was firmly established in grace, seeing that his merit was the only thing that could be put in the scale against the finest glebe in the county; but then, could she not appear sufficiently careless about him without being so unusually complaisant to such a set of louts?-If his presence made her happy, there was no necessity to give them license to presume to be happy likewise; and, besides, she might surely find some moments for revisiting her grotto, instead of uniformly turning from his hasty whisper, with-"It is better not." It was not so for. merly, and it was very reasonable to suppose that her three years' constancy had been sustained by some ideal picture of what he might turn out, in which she was now disappointed. He could not sleep. His restless fancy continually beheld her bright eyes look. ing tenderness upon the wooden face of Sir Lubin. He turned to the other side, and was haunted by a legion of young Lubins, who smiled upon him with Sibyl's looks till he almost groaned aloud. In the morning he came down with a hag-ridden countenance, which made people wonder what was the matter with him, and Sibyl asked him, with a look of ineffable archness, whether he was experiencing a return-of his head-aches.

Time rolled on very disagreeably. The Childe grew every day more pale and popular: the old ladies gave him more advice, and the old lord gave him more wine, and Sibyl grew mortified at his mistrust, and Sir Lubin grew afraid of his frown, and one half of the hall could not help being sorry, and the other half were obliged to be civil. Ajax and Ulysses had stepped into each other's shoes, and Sibyl to keep the peace, was obliged to accede to an interview in her little boudoir.

It was a fine honey-dropping afternoon. The sweet south was murmuring through the lattice amongst the strings of the guitar, and the golden fish were sporting till they almost flung themselves out of their crystal globe: it was just the hour for every thing to be sweet and harmonious-but Sibyl was somewhat vexed and the Childe was somewhat angry. He was much obliged to her for meeting him, but he feared that he In the second place, his opinions of ploughs and was taking her from more agreeable occupations; and politics, on which love had taught him to discourse he was, moreover, alarmed lest her other visiters but too successfully, made him a fixture at the punch-should want some one to amuse them. He merely bowl; while Sir Lubin and his tribe profaned Sibyl's wished to ask if she had any commands to his family, hand in country-dances as long as they had breath for for whom it was time that he should think of setting