I. SECT. III. HE next ftate which can fucceed to that of Marriage, is Widow-hood; which tho' it fuperfedes those duties which be terminated meerly in the person of the Husband, yet it endears those which may be paid to his afhes, love is ftrong as death, Cant, 8. 6. and therefore when it is pure and genuine, cannot be extinguish'd by it, but burns like the Funeral Lamps of old even in Vaults and Charnel-houses. The Conjugal love transplanted into the grave, (as into a finer mould) improves into Piety, and lays a kind of facred Obligation upon the Widow, to perform all Offices of Refpect and Kindness which his Remains are capable of. 2. Now those Remains are of three forts, his Body, his Memory, and his Children. The moft proper expreffion of her Love to the firft, is in giving it an Honourable Interment; I mean not fuch as may vie with the Poland Extravagance, (of which 'tis obferv'd, that two or three near fucceeding Funerals ruin the Family) but prudently proportion'd to his Quality and Fortune; fo that her zeal to his Corps may not injure a nobler Relick of him, his Children. And this decency is a much better inftance of her kindness, than all thofe Tragical Furies wherewith fome Women seem Tranfported towards their dead Husbands, thofe Frantick Embraces and Careffes of a Carcafs, which betray a little too much the fenfuality of their Love. And 'tis fomething obfervable, that those vehement Paffions quickly exhauft themselves, and by a kind of sympathetick Efficacy, as the Body (on which their Affection was fix'd) moulders, fo do's that also; nay, often it attends not thofe leisurely degrees of Diffolution, but by a more precipitate Motion, feems rather to Vanish than Confume. 3. THE more valuable kindness therefore, is that to his Memory, endeavouring to Embalm that, to keep it from perishing; and by this innocent Magick (as the Egyptians were wont by a more guilty) fhe may Converfe with the Dead, reprefent him fo to her own thoughts, that his Life may ftill be repeated to her; her, and as in a broken Mirrour the Refraction multiplies the Images, fo by his Diffolution, every hour prefents diftinct Ideas of him; fo that fhe fees him the oftner, for his being hid from her Eyes. But as they use not to Embalm without Odours,, so she is not only to preserve, but perfume his Memory, render it as Fragrant as she can, not only to her felf, but others; by reviving the remembrance of whatever was praife-worthy in him, vindicating him from all Calumnies and false Aecufations, and ftifling (or allaying) even true ones as much as the can. And indeed a Widow can no way better provide for her own Honour, than by this tenderness of her Husband's. 4. YET there is another expreffion of it, inferiour to none of the former, and that is the setting fuch a value upon her Relation to him, as to do nothing unworthy of it, Twas the dying charge of Auguftus to his Wife Livia, Behave thy felf well, and remember our Mars riage. And the who has been a Wife to a Perfon of Honour, must so remember it, as, not to do any thing below her felf, or which he (could he have foreseen it) fhould justly have been afham'd of. 5. THE laft Tribute the can pay him, is in his Children. Thefe he leaves as his Prokies to receive the kindness of which himfelf is uncapable; fo that the Children of a Widow may claim a double portion of the Mother's Love; one upon their native right, as hers; F f the the other, as a bequeft in right of their dead Father. And indeed, fince fhe is to fupply the place of both Parents, 'tis but neceffary fhe fhould put on the Affections of both, and to the tenderness of a Mother, add the care and conduct of a Father. Firft, in a fedulous care of their Education: and next, in a prudent managery of their Fortunes, an order that is fometimes unhappily inverted, and Mothers are fo concern'd to have the Eftate profper in their Tuition, that the Children cannot; whilft (by an unfeasonable Frugality) to fave a little Expence, they deny them the advantages of an Ingenuous and Gentile Breeding; fwell their Eftates perhaps to a vast bulk but fo contract and narrow their minds, that they know not how to difpofe them to any real benefit of themselves or others. And this is one of the most pernicious Parfimonies imaginable. A Mother by this feems to adopt the Fortune, and abdicate the Child, who is only made the Beaft to bear those loads of Wealth fhe will lay on, and which fhe evidently owns as the greatest Treafure, fince in tenderness to that the neglects him. 6. YET sometimes the fame effect springs from another caufe, and Children are ill bred, not because the Mother grudges the charge, but out of a Feminine fondnefs, which permits her not to part with them to the proper places for their Education. Like Jacob to Benjamin, her Soul is fo bound up in them, that the fhe cannot lend them a while even to their own most neceffary concerns. And this tho not fo ignoble a motive as the other, is of no less mischief, at leaft to her Sons, who being by it confind at home, are consequently condemn'd to be poifon'd (if with nothing else, yet) with the flatteries of Servants and Tenants, who think those the best expedient to fecure their own ftation. And with these the young Mafter or Landlord is fo blown up, that, as if his Manours were the Confines of the World, he can look at nothing beyond them: fo that when at last he breaks loofe from his Mother's Arms and comes abroad, he expects fcarce to find his equals, much lefs his betters; thinks he is still to receive the fame fawning adorations which he was us'd to at home: and being poffefs d with this infolent expectation, he will fcarce be undeceiv'd, but at the price of many affronts: nay, perhaps he may buy his experience with the lofs of his Life; by his ill Manners draw on a Quarrel, wherein he finally perifhes. That this is no impoffible fuppofition, fome unhappy Mothers have found to their unfpeakable affliction. 7. Tis not to be deny'd, but there are also Dangers confequent to the breeding Children abroad, Vice having infinuated it felf eyen into the places of Erudition, and having not only as many, but the very fame Academies with Virtue and Learning; fo that the extreme Depravation of the times new Ff2 ftates |