THE VOLUNTEER.

"The clashing of my armour in my ears
Sounds like a passing bell; my buckler puts me
In mind of a bier; this, my broadsword, a pickaxe
To dig my grave."

I.

THE LOVER'S PROGRESS.

'Twas in that memorable year
France threaten'd to put off in
Flat-bottom'd boats, intending each
To be a British coffin,

To make sad widows of our wives,

And every babe an orphan :

:

II.

When coats were made of scarlet cloaks,

And heads were dredg'd with flour,
I listed in the Lawyers' Corps,

Against the battle hour;

A perfect Volunteer-for why?
I brought my "will and pow'r."

III.

One dreary day-a day of dread,

Like Cato's, over-cast

About the hour of six, (the morn

And I were breaking fast,)

There came a loud and sudden sound,

That struck me all aghast !

IV.

A dismal sort of morning roll,
That was not to be eaten :
Although it was no skin of mine,
But parchment that was beaten,
I felt tattoo'd through all my flesh,
Like any Otaheitan.

V

My jaws with utter dread enclosed
The morsel I was munching,

And terror lock'd them up so tight,

My very teeth went crunching

All through my bread and tongue at once, Like sandwich made at lunching.

VI.

My hand that held the tea-pot fast,
Stiffen'd, but yet unsteady,

Kept pouring, pouring, pouring o'er

The cup in one long eddy,

Till both my hose were mark'd with tea, As they were mark'd already.

VII.

I felt my visage turn from red
To white-from cold to hot;
But it was nothing wonderful
My colour changed, I wot,
For, like some variable silks,
I felt that I was shot,

VIII.

And looking forth with anxious eye,
From my snug upper story,
I saw our melancholy corps,

Going to beds all gory;

The captain march'd as mourners march,

The ensign too seem'd lagging.

And many more, although they were
No ensigns, took to flagging-
Like corpses in the Serpentine,
Methought they wanted dragging.

X.

But while I watch'd, the thought of death

Came like a chilly gust,

And lo! I shut the window down,

With very little lust

To join so many marching men,

That soon might be March dust.

XI.

Quoth I, "since Fate ordains it so,
Our foe the coast must land on ;"-

I felt so warm beside the fire

I cared not to abandon;

Our hearths and homes are always things

That patriots make a stand on.

XII.

"The fools that fight abroad for home,"
Thought I, "may get a wrong one;
Let those that have no homes at all,
Go battle for a long one."

The mirror here confirm'd me this
Reflection, by a strong one.

XIII.

For there, where I was wont to shave,

And deck me like Adonis,

There stood the leader of our foes,

With vultures for his cronies

No Corsican, but Death himself,

The Bony of all Bonies.

XIV.

A horrid sight it was, and sad

To see the grisly chap
Put on my crimson livery,
And then begin to clap

My helmet on-ah me! it felt

Like any felon's сар.

XV.

My plume seem'd borrow'd from a hearse,

An undertaker's crest;

My epaulettes like coffin-plates;

My belt so heavy press'd,

Four pipeclay cross-roads seem'd to lie

At once upon my breast.

XVI.

My brazen breast-plate only lack'd

A little heap of salt,

To make me like a corpse full dress'd,

Preparing for the vault

To set up what the Poet calls

My everlasting halt.

XVII.

This funeral show inclined me quite

To peace:-and here I am!

Whilst better lions go to war,

Enjoying with the lamb

A lengthen'd life, that might have been

A martial epigram,

THE WEE MAN.

A ROMANCE.

IT was a merry company,
And they were just afloat,
When lo! a man, of dwarfish span,
Came up and hail'd the boat.

"Good morrow to ye, gentle folks,
And will you let me in?—
A slender space will serve my case,
For I am small and thin."

They saw he was a dwarfish man,
And very small and thin;
Not seven such would matter much,
And so they took him in.

They laugh'd to see his little hat,
With such a narrow brim ;
They laugh'd to note his dapper coat
With skirts so scant and trim.

But barely had they gone a mile,
When, gravely, one and all,
At once began to think the man
Was not so very small.

His coat had got a broader skirt,
His hat a broader brim,

His leg grew stout, and soon plump'd out
A very proper limb.