But in parting with these, I was puzzled again, I think they love venifon-I know they love beef: But hang it-to poets, who feldom can eat, An acquaintance, a friend as he call'd himself, enter'd; And he fmil'd as he look'd at the venifon and me. "What have we got here?-Why this is good eating! "Your own, I fuppofe or is it in waiting?" "Why, whose should it be?"-cry'd I, with a flounce; "I get these things often"—but that was a bounce: "Some lords, my acquaintance, that fettle the nation, "Are pleas'd to be kind-but I hate oftentation." "If that be the cafe then," cry'd he, very gay, "I'm glad I have taken this house in my way: "To-morrow you take a poor dinner with me; "No words-I infift on't-precisely at three: We'll have Johnfon,and Burke, all the wits will be there; My acquaintance is flight, or I'd ask my Lord Clare. "And, now that I think on't, as I am a finner, "We wanted this venifon to make out a dinner. "What say you—a pasty—it shall, and it must; "And my wife, little Kitty, is famous for cruft. "Here, porter, this venifon with me to Mile-end; "No ftirring, I beg-my dear friend-my dear friend!” Thus fnatching his hat, he brush'd off like the wind, And the porter and eatables follow'd behind. Left alone to reflect, having emptied my shelf, And "nobody with me at sea but myself;" Tho' I could not help thinking my gentleman hafty, Yet Johnson, and Burke, and a good venifon pafty, Were things that I never dislik'd in my life, Tho' clogg'd with a coxcomb, and Kitty his wife: So next day, in due splendour to make my approach, I drove to his door in my own hackney-coach. When come to the place where we all were to dine, (A chair-lumber'd closet just twelve feet by nine) My friend bade me welcome, but ftruck me quite dumb With tidings that Johnson and Burke would not come; "For I knew it," he cry'd, "both eternally fail, "The one with his speeches, and t'other with Thrale; "But no matter, I'll warrant we'll make up the party "With two full as clever, and ten times as hearty: "The one is a Scotchman, the other a Jew"They both of them merry, and authors like you; "The one writes the Snarler, the other the Scourge; "Some think he writes Cinna-he owns to Panurge." While thus he describ'd them by trade and by name, They enter'd, and dinner was ferv'd as they came. At the top a fry'd liver and bacon were seen, At the bottom was tripe, in a swinging tureen; At the fides there was spinnage and pudding made hot; In the middle a place where the pasty—was not. Now, my lord, as for tripe, it's my utter averfion, And your bacon I hate like a Turk or a Perfian; * See the letters that passed between his Royal Highness Henry Duke of Cumberland and Lady Grofvenor---1769. So there I fat ftuck, like a horse in a pound, While the bacon and liver went merrily round: But what vex'd me moft, was that d-'d Scottish rogue, 66 Pray a flice of your liver, though may I be curft, Though splitting, I'll ftill keep a corner for that." "We'll all keep a corner," the lady cry'd out; "We'll all keep a corner," was echo'd about. While thus we refolv'd, and the pafty delay'd, With looks that quite petrify'd, enter'd the maid! A vifage fo fad, and fo pale with affright, Wak'd Priam in drawing his curtains by night! But we quickly found out-for who could mistake her- Had shut out the pasty on shutting his oven! You've got an odd fomething-a kind of difcerning- At leaft it's your temper, as very well known, A DESCRIPTION OF AN AUTHOR'S BED-CHAMBER. WHERE the Red-Lion staring o'er the way, The rufty grate unconfcious of a fire; With beer and milk arrears the frieze was fcor'd, A cap by night-a ftocking all the day! THE DOUBLE TRANSFORMATION. A TALE. SECLUDED from domestic strife, Made him the happiest man alive- Such pleasures, unalloy'd with care, Could Cupid's shaft at length transfix Need we expofe to vulgar fight -marry'd. |