A BARGAIN WITH A QUAKER

[From "The Sot-Weed Factor"]

I then began to think with Care,
How I might sell my British Ware,
That with my Freight I might comply,
Did on my Charter party lie:
To this intent, with Guide before,
I tript it to the Eastern Shoar;
While riding near a Sandy Bay,
I met a Quaker, Yea and Nay;
A Pious Conscientious Rogue,
As e'er woar Bonnet or a Brogue,
Who neither Swore nor kept his Word,
But cheated in the Fear of God;
And when his Debts he would not pay,
By Light within he ran away.
With this sly Zealot soon I struck
A Bargain for my English Truck,
Agreeing for ten thousand weight,
Of Sot-weed good and fit for freight,
Broad Oronooko bright and sound,
The growth and product of his ground;
In Cask that should contain compleat,
Five hundred of Tobacco neat.
The Contract thus betwixt us made,
Not well acquainted with the Trade,
My Goods I trusted to the Cheat,
Whose crop was then aboard the Fleet;
And going to receive my own,
I found the Bird was newly flown:
Cursing this execrable Slave,

This damn'd pretended Godly Knave;
On due Revenge and Justice bent,
I instantly to Counsel went,

1

Unto an ambodexter 1 Quack,

Who learnedly had got the knack

'This Fellow was an Apothecary, and turn'd an Attorney at Law.

Of giving Glisters, making Pills,
Of filling Bonds, and forging Wills;
And with a stock of Impudence,
Supply'd his want of Wit and Sense;
With Looks demure, amazing People,
No wiser than a Daw in Steeple;
My Anger flushing in my Face,
I stated the preceeding Case:
And of my Money was so lavish,
That he'd have poyson'd half the Parish,
And hang'd his Father on a Tree,
For such another tempting Fee;
Smiling, said he, the Cause is clear,
I'll manage him you need not fear;
The Case is judg'd, good Sir, but look
In Galen, No in my Lord Cook,
I vow to God I was mistook:
I'll take out a Provincial Writ,

And Trounce him for his Knavish Wit;
Upon my Life we'll win the Cause,
With all the ease I cure the Yaws:
Resolv'd to plague the holy Brother,
I set one Rogue to catch another;
To try the Cause then fully bent,
Up to Annapolis I went,

A City Situate on a Plain,

Where scarce a House will keep out Rain;
The Buildings fram'd with Cyprus rare,
Resembles much our Southwark Fair:
But Stranger here will scarcely meet
With Market-place, Exchange, or Street;
And if the Truth I may report,
'Tis not so large as Tottenham Court.
St. Mary's once was in repute,
Now here the Judges try the Suit,
And Lawyers twice a Year dispute.
As oft the Bench most gravely meet,
Some to get Drunk, and some to eat,

S

A swinging share of Country Treat.
But as for Justice right or wrong,
Not one amongst the numerous throng,
Knows what they mean, or has the Heart,
To give his Verdict on a Stranger's part:
Now Court being call'd by beat of Drum,
The Judges left their Punch and Rum,
When Pettifogger Doctor draws,
His Paper forth, and opens Cause:
And least I should the better get,
Brib'd Quack supprest his Knavish Wit.

*

The Byast Court without delay,
Adjudg'd my Debt in Country Pay;
In1 Pipe Staves, Corn, or Flesh of Boar,
Rare Cargo for the English Shoar:
Raging with Grief, full speed I ran,
To joyn the Fleet at2 Kicketan;
Embarqu'd and waiting for a Wind,
I left this dreadful Curse behind.

May Canniballs transported o'er the Sea
Prey on these Slaves, as they have done on me;
May never Merchant's, trading Sails explore
This Cruel, this Inhospitable Shoar;

But left abandon'd by the World to starve,
May they sustain the Fate they well deserve:
May they turn Savage, or as Indians Wild,
From Trade, Converse, and Happiness exil'd;
Recreant to Heaven, may they adore the Sun,
And into Pagan Superstitions run

For Vengeance ripe

May Wrath Divine then lay those Regions wast

Where no Man's Faithful, nor a Woman Chast.

There is a Law in this Country, the Plantiff may pay his Debt in Country pay, which consists in the produce of his Plantation.

2 The homeward bound Fleet meets here.

The Author does not intend by this, any of the English Gentlemen resident there.

WILLIAM BYRD

[William Byrd, of Westover, was a type of the wealthy and cultured Virginia gentleman who wrote as an avocation. He was born in Virginia in 1674, and educated in England and on the Continent. Before he returned to America, he studied law at the Middle Temple, and was called to the Bar, and also became a member of the Royal Society. At home he devoted himself to managing the estate which his father had built up, to the performance of many public duties, to the acquiring of a large library, and to the social and intellectual enjoyments available among the aristocracy of Virginia in their best days. One of his public employments was as member of the Commission which in 1728 established the boundary line between Virginia and North Carolina. An elaboration of the journal kept during this survey is the chief of his writings

Colonel Byrd's writings were not published during his lifetime, but were carefully copied under his direction and bound into a manuscript volume for preservation in his family. The chief papers in this volume are, besides "The History of the Dividing Line," already referred to, "A Journey to the Land of Eden," "A Progress to the Mines," and "An Essay on Bulk Tobacco." The authorship of the last-named essay is questioned by Byrd's latest editor. The other three papers are accounts of expeditions in the less settled parts of the colony. The observations which the author records show his wide interest, which embraced not only matters of practical economic importance, but curiosities in natural history, medicine, etc.; and allusions to his reading are an interesting revelation of the culture of his day. The papers are written in a style that makes even the narration of commonplace facts interesting, and they abound in a wit that, when it avoids the loose conventional jests that were the fashion, is sprightly and genuine.

The chief of the "Westover Manuscripts," as they have been called from the family residence where they were preserved, have been printed in 1841, 1866, and 1901. The following selections are from the latest edition, by John Spencer Bassett.]

THE BEGINNING OF THE SURVEY

[From "The History of the Dividing Line"]

[March] 7. This Morning the Surveyors began to run the Dividing line from the Cedar-Post we had driven into the Sand, allowing near 3 Degrees for the Variation. Without making this

Just allowance, we should not have obeyd his Majesty's order in running a Due West Line. It seems the former Commissioners had not been so exact, which gave our Friends of Carolina but too just an Exception to their Proceedings.

The Line cut Dosier's Island, consisting only of a Flat Sand, with here and there an humble Shrub growing upon it. From thence it crost over a narrow Arm of the Sound into Knot's Island, and there Split a Plantation belonging to William Harding.

The Day being far spent, we encampt in this Man's Pasture, tho' it lay very low, and the Season now inclin'd People to Aguish Distempers. He suffered us to cut Cedar-Branches for our Enclosure, and other Wood for Firing, to correct the moist Air and drive away the Damps. Our Landlady, in the Days of her Youth, it seems, had been a Laundress in the Temple, and talkt over her Adventures in that Station, with as much pleasure as an Old Soldier talks over his Battles and Distempers, and I believe with as many Additions to the Truth.

The Soil is good in many Places of this Island, and the Extent of it pretty large. It lyes in the form of a Wedge: The South End of it is Several Miles over, but towards the North it Sharpens into a Point. It is a Plentiful Place for Stock, by reason of the wide Marshes adjacent to it, and because of its warm Situation. But the Inhabitants pay a little dear for this Convenience, by losing as much Blood in the Summer Season by the infinite Number of Mosquetas, as all their Beef and Pork can recruit in the Winter.

The Sheep are as large as in Lincolnshire, because they are never pincht by cold or Hunger. The whole Island was hitherto reckon❜d to lye in Virginia, but now our Line has given the greater Part of it to Carolina. The Principal Freeholder here is Mr. White, who keeps open House for all Travellers, that either Debt or Shipwreck happens to cast in his way.

8. By break of Day we sent away our Largest Periauga, with the Baggage, round the South end of Knot's Island, with Orders to the Men to wait for us in the Mouth of North River. Soon after, we embarkt ourselves on board the smaller Vessel, with Intent, if possible, to find a Passage round the North End of the Island.

We found this Navigation very difficult, by reason of the Continued Shoals, and often stuck fast aground; for tho' the Sound