But Hodges, though so much he prized
Our peers-all foreign rank despised,
Declared, with generous warmth, he thought
The same the sovereign and the snob,
And swore, since Siam must be taught
New steps-to lead off with the mob !

Accordingly our saint one day,
Into the market took his way,
Climb'd on an empty tub, that o'er

Their heads he might declaim at ease,
And to the rout began to roar

In wretched Siamese.

"Brethren! (for every one's my fellow,
"Tho' I am white, and you are yellow,)
"Brethren! I come from lands afar

"To tell you all-what fools you are!
"Is slavery, pray, so soft, and glib a tie,
"That you prefer the chain to liberty?
"Is Christian faith a melancholy tree,
"That you will only sow idolatry?

"Just see to what good laws can bring lands,
"And hear an outline of old England's.
"Now, say if here a Lord should hurt you,
"Are you made whole by legal virtue?

(Captain Crauford) but a rascal in general-the sort of creature in short

-that in England we should call

an Agent!

"For ills by battery, or detraction,

“Say, can you bring at once your action?
"And are the rich not much more sure
"To gain a verdict, than the poor?
"With us alike the poor or rich,
"Peasant or prince, no matter which
"Justice to all, the law dispenses,
"And all it costs-are the expenses !
"Here, if an elephant you slay,
"Your very lives the forfeit pay;
"Now, that's a quid pro quo-too seri-
"Ous much for beasts naturæ feræ.
"With us no beast, or bird, is holy-

"Such nonsense really seems to shame laws! "And all things wild, we shoot at-solely

16

Subject to little hints, call'd Game Laws.' "Your parsons dun you into giving— "Ours take their own-a paltry living. "Each selfish wish they nobly stifle, "And save our souls-for quite a trifle.

"Our lords are neither mean nor arrogant,

"Nor war against broad truths by narrow cant; "Ne'er wish for perquisites, nor sinecures, "Nor prop great ills, by proffering tiny cures; "Our goods before their own they rate 'em, "And as for younger sons-they hate 'em! "Thus all our patriots are invincible,

"And, bless you!-as to change of principle !

"'Ev'n if one wish'd to chouse the people, "One's by the Lower House prevented; "There, by a slight expense of tipple, "We've all the Commons represented— "And with such singular ability,

"No groat's ere spent with inutility.* "Thus do we hold both license-and

66

Despotic fetters in ludibrium;

"And thus must England ever stand "Erect-in triple equilibrium!

"These are the things that best distinguish men-
"These make the glorious boast of Englishmen !
"More could I tell you, were there leisure,
“But I have said enough to please, sure;
"Now, then, if you the resolution
"Take, or a British Constitution,

"A British King, Church, Commons, Peers-
"I'll be your guide! dismiss your fears.

"With Hampden's name and memory warm you!

And, d-n you all-but I'll reform

"As for the dogs that won't be free,

you!

"We'll give it them most handsomely;

"To church with scourge and halter lead 'em, "And thrash the rascals into freedom."

* Here the orator proceeds to enlarge upon the excellent formation of our House of Commons. But why print his prolix panegyrics after the Duke of Wellington's pithy eulogium? Besides, before this poem be published, that beautiful formation may be lost to the House of Commons.

Thus Hodges spoke, and ceasing, bowed,
Graceful as Burdett, to the crowd,
Who, need I say, could comprehend
No word ab ovo to the end.

But thought his accent vastly funny,
And hoped he meant to give them money.
Meanwhile, one wag, a little mellow,
Cried to his neighbours, with a grin,
Suppose we give this charming fellow
"A lift upon a palanquin!"

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As sparks on tinder-words that call
To mirth-on vulgar meetings fall—
Our mob more joyously than gently,
Round Hodges closed incontinently;
On him with vigorous hands they set,

As from his tub he now descended,
And plunged him in a sort of net,

Or hammock, from a pole suspended.*
This then was placed upon the shoulders
(One at each end) of two upholders,
And thus the astounded patriot lodges—
On high-think what a rise for Hodges!
Then, to and fro, and up and down,
They trot the patriot through the town,

* "These palanquins consisted merely of a netting in the exact shape of a sailor's hammock, suspended from a pole; and each vehicle was carried on the shoulders of two men, one at each end of the pole. We at first experienced a little difficulty in preventing ourselves from rolling out of this contrivance."-Finlayson's Mission to Siam.

And mark, with many a jovial shout,
How well he 'scapes from rolling out;
As now he sits secure, and now,
With starting eyes, and horrent brow,
On brink of fate appears to hover,
Is all but in, and all but over;

Gripes with one hand the net, and shakes
The other at them in despair,

And asks if no damned statute takes

A British life beneath its care?
A toss breaks off the words he's uttering,
And swearing trembles into stuttering:
I'm sure you'll pardon him for swearing.
It is no joke, that sort of chairing!
And Claudian says-(how that old stuff
Boys read, to all men meet applies,)
‹ That men, like Hodges, must be rough
'In manner—when they take a rise !'*

Now Chang and Ching had all the while
Been two among the motley meeting,
And heard the speech--Ching, with a smile,
Listened and thought some man of guile,
With juggling tricks the crowd was cheating;
But Chang, with wrinkled brow, and eyes
That like an owl's looked wond'rous wise,

'Asperius nihil est humili cum surgit in altum."---Claudian.