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felf; but he laid the Fault partly upon the Robes he was obliged to wear before the Emperor, which, as he faid, entangled his Feet; and partly upon the maliciousness of a By-ftander, whom he accused of pulling the Rope afide, as he was in the midst of his Caper However that was, poor Bullum broke his Leg, and was carried to his own House, where he continued Lame above Two Years, not being able to fhew himself in Publick all that Time; and it was thought he would never have recovered, if the Emperor at laft, had not taken pity on him, and sent one of his own Surgeons to him, who cured him immediately.

After all these Misfortunes Bullum could not forfake his beloved Diverfion, but as foon as he was recovered, he forgot all that was paft, and danced again in his own School every Day; where, by his frequent Falls he so bruised himself, that it was believed they would come to a Mortification: Befides, he dances fo long upon the fame Rope that through Age and Rottennefs, and his great Weight, it.muft break at laft; and the Emperor would fcarce. lend him a Surgeon a fecond Time; which indeed would be in vain, for he can never leave off the Sport, though he performs worse and worse every Day; fo that in all probability he will break his Neck for a Conclufion.

THE

STATE QUACKS,

OR THE

Political Botchers;

Being a Description of the

STRANGE OCCURRENCES

OF THE

Prefent TIMES.

I

Fever any Year might juftly be called a Year of WONDERS, this feems with the greatest Reason and Authority to lay Claim to

the Appellation, and supercede the Titles of all that have gone before it: The furprizing Revolutions and Events; the Advancement of fome, and Cataftrophe of others; Thefe rais'd to the highest

Pitch of Honour, whilft others, humbled from the very Height of Power as well as Grandeur are funk. into the lowest Abyss of Contempt and Scorn, look fo like Paradoxes, that Pofterity will fcarcely Credit the Report, and Futurity will believe the History to be nothing but a meer Romance.

Could Antiquity retrieve, or fucceeding Ages anticipate their Fate, could our Ancestors throw off the Chains of Corruption, break open the Prifons of their Graves, bid Defiance to the Univerfal Conqueror of Mankind; again converfe with Matter, and take Cognizance of Humane Affairs; or could the Children that are yet unborn, the Progeny of yet unbegotten Ages, reverfe the Order of Nature, and be indulged with a Personal Knowledge and Information of the Tranfactions and Occurrences of this present Age; how would they be confounded with Admiration, and scarce give Credit to themfelves! Nothing that is already past, would feem Wonderful to the former, nor would any Thing, that the Womb of Futurity can produce, be furprizing to the other.

But yet the most unaccountable of all, is this, that Men, not Things, are principally affected with thefe Occurrences, and tho' a general Transformation has pafs'd upon most, if not all, yet few or none are fenfible of the Metamorphofis: Nor has the Contagion fpread itfelf only among Men, but the fofter Sex are infected; neither is this or that Order or Rank of People, but Clergy and Laity, High and Low, Rich and Poor, Wife and Foolish, Old and Young; in a Word, the Distemper is become Epidemical and Univerfal; and even I myself, whilst I am Writing, muft acknowledge, that I am tainted with it, and that this very Piece, like Caufe

K 4

and

and Confequence, is the genuine Product of the fame Original.

'Tis true, all Perfons are not alike infected, nor is the Transformation fo compleat in fome, as o thers; but like the Production of Animals, after the Univerfal Deluge, fo ingeniously defcribed by Quid, that great Mafter of Poetry and Invention; when the Mud being impregnated by the Warmth of the Sun, brought forth living Creatures of various Kinds and Forms; He is pleas'd to tell us, that whilft fome Part of the fame Creature remain'd undigested Clay, the other was endow'd with Life and Motion; others were only form'd, but were not quickned or enliven'd in any Part, whilft fome again were compleat and perfect in both Refpects.

Whether the Metamorphofis, written by that cele brated Author, were merely the fictitious Product of a fruitful Brain, contriv'd only for Amusement and Diverfion, or whether they were Allegorical, pointing out the Manners and Behaviour of Men, matters not; 'tis fufficient, nothing in them is more> incredible, or affords more proper Subjects for Speculation, than this prefent Treatife, and yet not a Syllable is to be found herein, which will not ftand the Teft of Reason, and comes no way fhort of a Demonstration,

For tho' thefe Changes and Transformations are not Corporal, and on the Bodies of Perfons, but on their Minds, yet are they Real and Self-evident in Converfation; and what renders them the more furprizing in themselves, (I mean the frequency of Examples,) does yet in Practice abate the Wonder and diverts our Obfervation.

What is more common, and yet what can be more amazing in itself, than to fee the Tribe of Levi forgetting their Duty of Gospel-Teachers,

even in their Pulpits, raifing a Difcourfe of Politicks from a Text of Scripture, that means nothing of it? And on the contrary, to find a Cobler in his Stall, or a Taylor on his Shop-board, encroaching on the Sacerdotal Office? And what a diverting Spectacle is it, to fee a Prieft in his Canonical Habit, transform'd into a Peripatetick Bibliopola, or into a Mercury, hurrying, with his Gown-fleeves stuff'd with Pamphlets from one Bookfeller's Shop to another's, laying down his Sixpenny Packêts and Academical Nonfenfe, to be expos'd to Sale?

What a pleasant Sight is it to fee fuch a One purfuing the Hawkers and Halfpenny Pamphleteers from one end of the Town to another, hunting them through all their Holes and Corners; and not content with this, betraying his Friends and Acquaintance, that he may acquire the honourable Character and Title, as well as Office, of InformerGeneral; raifing the Trophies of his Victories on the Ruins of the Tribe of Half-Crown Scriblers and Authors, whilft his own elaborate Performances cannot find a Chapman, but must be printed for the Author, and the very firft Edition difpos'd of in a Lump, after indefatigable Pains, to furnifh wafte Paper to a Chandler's Shop?

What glorious Triumphs are thefe, that though he cannot, as a Minifter of the Gofpel, beat down the Kingdom of Satan in the World, nor expel Sin out of the Souls of Sinners, yet he can drive the fcurvy Authors out of their Holes, forcing them to flee for Shelter from one Garret to another, whilst " the bawling Promoters of low-priz'd Nonfenfe, feel the Weight of his informing Vengeance, and may read their Indictments, written on their Backs in fanguine Characters, by the unmerciful Hands of an infulting Beadle? What Tranfports muft it raife in

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