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SUGGESTIONS ON MARRIAGE.

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Let no lady commence and continue a correspondence with a view to marriage, for fear that she may never have another opportunity. It is the mark of judgment and rare good sense to go through life without wedlock, if she cannot marry from love. Somewhere in eternity, the

poet tells us, our true mate will be found. Do not be afraid of being an "old maid." The disgrace attached to that term has long since passed away. Unmarried ladies of mature years are proverbially among the most intelligent, accomplished and independent to be found in society. The sphere of woman's action and work is so widening that she can to-day, if she desires, handsomely and independently support herself. She need not, therefore, marry for a home.

INTEMPERATE MEN.

Above all, no lady should allow herself to correspond with an intemperate man, with a view to matrimony. She may reform him, but the chances are that her life's happiness will be completely destroyed by such a union. Better, a thousand times, the single, free and independent maidenhood, than for a woman to trail her life in the dust, and bring poverty, shame and disgrace on her children, by marrying a man addicted to dissipated habits.

MARRYING WEALTH.

Let no man make it an ultimate object in life to marry a rich wife. It is not the possession, but the acquisition, of wealth, that gives happiness. It is a generally conceded fact that the inheritance of great wealth is a positive mental and moral injury to young men, completely destroying the stimulus to advancement. So, as a rule, no man is permanently made happier by a marriage of wealth; while he is quite likely to

be given to understand, by his wife and others, from time to time, that, whatever consequence he may attain, it is all the result of his wife's money. Most independent men prefer to start, as all our wealthiest and greatest men have done, at the foot of the ladder, and earn their independence. Where, however, a man can bring extraordinary talent or distinguished reputation, as a balance for his wife's wealth, the conditions are more nearly equalized. Observation shows that those marriages prove most serenely happy where husband and wife, at the time of marriage, stand, socially, intellectually and pecuniarily, very nearly equal. For the chances of successful advancement and happiness in after life, let a man wed a woman poorer than himself rather than one that is richer.

POVERTY.

Let no couple hesitate to marry because they are poor. It will cost them less to live after marriage than before-one light, one fire, etc., answering the purpose for both. Having an object to live for, also, they will commence their accumulations after marriage as never before. The young woman that demands a certain amount of costly style, beyond the income of her betrothed, no young man should ever wed. As a general thing, however, women have common. sense, and, if husbands will perfectly confide in their wives, telling them exactly their pecuniary condition, the wife will live within the husband's income. In the majority of cases where men fail in business, the failure being attributed to the wife's extravagance, the wife has been kept in entire ignorance of her husband's pecuniary resources. The man who would be successful in business, should not only marry a woman who is worthy of his confidence, but he should at all times advise with her. She is more interested in his prosperity than anybody else, and will be found his best counselor and friend.

CONFIDENCE AND HONOR.

The love correspondence of another should be held sacred, the rule of conduct being, to do

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to others as you wish them to do to you. No woman, who is a lady, will be guilty of making light of the sentiments that are expressed to her in a letter. No man, who is a gentleman, will boast of his love conquests, among boon companions, or reveal to others the correspondence between himself and a lady. If an engagement is mutually broken off, all the loveletters should be returned. To retain them is dishonorable. They were written under circumstances that no longer exist. It is better for both parties to wash out every recollection of the past, by returning to the giver every memento of the dead love.

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HOW TO BEGIN A LOVE CORRESPONDENCE.

Some gentlemen, being very favorably impressed with a lady at first sight, and having no immediate opportunity for introduction, make bold, after learning her name, to write her at once, seeking an interview, the form of which letter will be found hereafter. A gentleman in doing so, however, runs considerable risk of receiving a rebuff from the lady, though not always. It is better to take a little more time, learn thoroughly who the lady is, and obtain an introduction through a mutual acquaintance. Much less embarrassment attends such a meeting; and, having learned the lady's antecedents, subjects are easily introduced in which she is interested, and thus the first interview can be made quite agreeable.

The way is now paved for the opening of a correspondence, which may be done by a note inviting her company to any entertainment supposed to be agreeable to her, or the further pleasure of her acquaintance by correspondence, as follows:

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DEAR MISS HAWLEY:

Love at First Sight.

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ST., June 1, 18-. You will, I trust, forgive this abrupt and plainly spoken letter. Although I have been in your company but once, I cannot forbear writing to you in defiance of all rules of etiquette. Affection is sometimes of slow growth, but sometimes it springs up in a moment. I left you last night with my heart no longer my own. I cannot, of course, hope that I have created any interest in you, but will you do me the great favor to allow me to cultivate your acquaintance? Hoping that you may regard me favorably, I shall await with much anxiety your reply. I remain,

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I am very desirous of making the acquaintance of Miss Benjamin, with whom you are on terms of intimate friendship. Will you be so kind as to give me a letter of introduction to her? I am aware that it may be a delicate letter for you to write, but you will be free, of course, to make all needed explanations in your letter to her. I will send her your letter, instead of personally calling upon her myself, thus saving her from any embarrassment that may result from my so doing. By granting this favor, you will much oblige, Yours, Very Respectfully, WM. H. TYLER.

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Dear Sir: Undoubtedly I ought to call you severely to account for your declaration of love at first sight, but I really cannot find it in my heart to do so, as I must confess that, after our brief interview last evening, I have thought much more of you than I should have been willing to have acknowledged had you not come to the confession first. Seriously speaking, we know but very little of each other yet, and we must be very careful not to exchange our hearts in the dark. I shall be happy to receive you here, as a friend, with a view to our further acquaintance. I remain, dear sir,

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I go west, to-morrow, on business, leaving my heart in your gentle keeping. You need be at no expense in placing a guard around it, for I assure you that, as surely as the needle points towards the pole, so surely my love is all yours. I shall go, dearest, by the first train, hoping thereby to return just one train sooner, which means that not an hour, not a minute longer will I be absent from you, than is imperatively necessary. Like the angler, I shall "drop a line" frequently, and shall expect a very prompt response, letter for letter. No credit given in this case; business is business-I must have prompt returns. Ever Faithfully Yours,

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Enclosed, find the note you wish. As you will observe,

I have acted upon your suggestion of giving her sufficient explanation to justify my letter. Your desire to please the lady, coupled with your good judgment, will, I doubt not, make the matter agreeable. Truly Yours,

HENRY PARSONS.

LETTER OF INTRODUCTION.

DEAR MISS BENJAMIN: This will introduce to you my friend Wm. Tyler, who is very desirous of making your acquaintance, and, having no other means of doing so, asks of me the favor of writing this note of introduction, which he will send you, instead of calling himself, thus leaving you free to grant him an interview or not. Mr. Tyler is a gentleman I very highly respect, and whose acquaintance, I think, you would not have occasion to regret. Nevertheless, you may not regard this a proper method of introduction, in which case, allow me to assure you, I will entertain the same respect for yourself, if you will frankly state so, though it would be gratifying to Mr. Tyler and myself to have it otherwise. With sincere respect, I am,

RESPECTED SIR:

Very Respectfully,

HENRY PARSONS.

To the Father of the Lady.

BURLINGTON, Iowa, Jan. 1, 18—.

I take this means of consulting you on a subject that deeply interests myself, while it indirectly concerns you; and I trust that my presentation of the matter will meet with your approval. For several months your daughter Mary and myself have been on intimate terms of friendship, which has ripened into affection on my part, and I have reason to think that my attentions are not indifferent to her. My business and prospects are such that I flatter myself I can provide for her future, with the same comfort that has surrounded her under the parental roof. Of my character and qualifications, I have nothing to say; I trust they are sufficiently known to you to give confidence in the prospect of your child's happiness.

Believing that the parents have such an interest in the welfare of the daughter as makes it obligatory upon the lover to consult their desires, before taking her from their home, I am thus induced to request you to express your wishes upon this subject.

I shall anxiously await your answer.

Your Very Obedient Servant,

To WM. FRANKLIN, ESQ., 184 ST.

DANIEL HARRISON.

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Highly appreciating the straightforward and gentlemanly manner in which you have written me concerning a subject that every parent has an interest in, I am compelled to inform you that, though my daughter has treated you with much friendliness, as she is accustomed to with all her friends, she will be unable to continue with you a love acquaintance with a view to marriage, owing to a prior engagement with a gentleman of worth and respectability, which contract she has no occasion to regret.

Fully sensible of your most excellent qualities, and the compliment paid in your selection of her, my daughter unites with me in the wish that you may meet with a companion in every way calculated to ensure your happiness.

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that the person using the same involuntarily craves strong drink, in order to taste it. Therein lies the foundation of a large share of the drunkenness of the country. Observation proves that, while many men use tobacco that are not drunkards, almost every drunkard is a user of tobacco, having nearly always formed the habit from the use of this narcotic weed.

It would surround me with filth. To say nothing of the great drain on the physical health by the constant expectoration of saliva, thus ruining the health of many robust constitutions, I could not endure the fetid breath of the tobacco-user. I sicken at the sight of the brown saliva exuding from between the lips; physiology proving that, with tobacco-chewers, nearly all the waste fluids from the body pass through the mouth. I am immediately faint at the thought of dragging my skirts through spittle in a railway car, or any place where it is thrown upon the floor; I turn with disgust at the atmosphere - God's pure, fresh air- that is tainted with the stench of tobacco smoke. It would corrupt my husband's morals. All the associations of tobacco are bad. It is true that many good men use tobacco. It is also a truth that nearly every man that is bad is addicted to its use. To smoke in peace, the man must resort to the place where others smoke. In that room are profanity, obscene language and every species of vulgarity. There may be occasionally an exception. The fact is patent, however, that, in the room in which vulgarity and obscenity prevail, there is always tobacco smoke in the air, and the vile spittle on the floor. You will forgive me for speaking thus plainly. I love you too well to disguise my feelings on the subject. I could not possibly constantly love a tobacco-user, for the reasons that I have given.

While I devotedly love you, I cannot consent that you should bestow your affections upon a person that would instinctively repel you. Believing, therefore, under the circumstances, that our further correspondence should ceasc, I remain,

Your Friend and Well-Wisher,

MARIETTA WILCOX.

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I am in receipt of your courteous letter, containing a declaration of love. I will be frank enough with you to admit that, while I have been sensible of your affectionate regard for me for some months, I have also cherished a growing interest in you. In truth, to make a candid confession, I most sincerely love you. I should, perhaps, say no more, but I feel it due to you, as well as to myself, to be strictly honest in my expression, lest we foster this growing love, which, under present conditions, must be broken off.

I have always admired your natural ability; I appreciate yon for your industry; I respect you for your filial conduct towards your parents. In fact, I consider you quite a model young man, were it not for one habit, which has always been, heretofore, a very delicate subject for me to speak of, fearing that it might give you offense. But believing it best that I be true to my convictions and state my objec tions plainly, I thus freely write them.

I have reference to the use of tobacco. Apparently, this is a little thing. I am aware that ladies generally consider it beneath their notice; but so thoroughly convinced am I that it is one of the most destructive habits, sapping the morality and vigor of our young men, that I could never consent to wed a man addicted to its use, my reasons being as follows:

It would impoverish my home. Only ten cents a day expended for a cigar, in a lifetime of forty years, with its accumulations of interest, amounts to over four thousand dollars! The little sum of eleven cents per day, saved from being squandered on tobacco, and properly put at interest, amounts in that time to $5,160! No wonder so many homes, the heads of which use tobacco, are without the comforts of life.

It might wreck my happiness. It is a well-known physological fact that the use of tobacco deadens the sense of taste; that water and all common drinks become insipid and tasteless when tobacco is used, so

Letter to an Entire Stranger.

MISS HENDERSON:

478 ST., Jan. 1, 18—. I beg to apologize for addressing you thus, being an entire stranger; but having the misfortune to be unknown to you is my excuse for this strange proceeding, which, I am well aware, is entirely at variance with the rules of etiquette. I have for two sabbaths seen you at church, and I am frank to confess that your appearance has made so deep an impression upon me as to make me extremely desirous of forming your acquaintance. I am, at present, a clerk in the ribbon department at Smith & Brown's store. Will you do me the great favor of allowing this to commence a friendship, which, I trust, will never be regretted by yourself. Please deign to give me at least a single line in reply to this, and oblige,

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I considerably question whether it is due to propriety to answer your note at all. But as you might fear that your letter had miscarried, and thus be induced to write again, it is best, probably, for me to make an immediate reply, and thus settle the affair entirely, and relieve you, possibly, of further suspense. It will be impossible for me to recognize you, or to think under any circumstances of permitting an acquaintance to be commenced by such an introduction as you seem to deem sufficient. More especially should I regret allowing a friendship to be formed by recognitions in the hours of divine service ip church, while the mind should be employed in religious observances. You will, therefore, please understand that I am not favorable to further recognition, nor to a continuance of correspondence.

AMELIA HENDERSON.

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MR. BARNUM.

Dear Sir:

Reply More Favorable.

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ST., June 10, 18-.

I am in receipt of your note, and must confess that I am surprised at your request. I am entirely opposed to commencing, on general principles, an acquaintance with such an introduction, and consider it very improper, especially to allow it to originate in church during the hours of divine service. Were it not that I think your

It is clearly evident, therefore, that she should not give her name and address as requested; and yet, as the advertisement may refer to a business matter of importance, or bring about an acquaintance that she will not regret, she may relieve her curiosity on the subject by

meaning kind and your intentions good, I would return your letter Writing the following note in reply:

unanswered. As it is, I will take your request under consideration, and, if I think best to grant it, you may know of the fact by my recognition at the close of the service in the Sabbath School.

Respectfully,

AMELIA HENDERSON.

An Advertisement in a Morning Paper.

ERSONAL.-Will the lady who rode up Broadway last Thursday Stewart's, accompanied by a little girl dressed in blue suit, please send her address to D. B. M., Herald office?

REMARKS.

It is useless to advise people never to reply to

D. B. M.:

THE REPLY.

(Advertisement pasted in.)

I find the above advertisement in the "Herald" of this morning. I suppose myself to be the person referred to. You will please state your object in addressing me, with references. Address, A. L. K., Herald Office.

It is probable that the advertiser, if a gentleman, will reply, giving his reasons for requesting the lady's address, with references, upon receiving which, the lady will do as she may choose relative to continuing the correspond

a personal advertisement like the above. To do so is like totally refusing young people the priv-ence; in either case, it will be seen that she has so is like totally refusing young people the priv- in no wise compromised her dignity, and she ilege of dancing. People will dance, and they retains the advantage of knowing the motive and will answer personal advertisements. The best course, therefore, is to properly direct the dan-object that prompted the advertisement, while

cers, and caution the writers in their answers to newspaper personals. If the eye of the young lady referred to meets the above advertisement, she will possibly be indignant at first, and will, perhaps, resolve to pay no attention to it. It will continue to occupy her attention so much, however, and curiosity will become so great, that, in order to ease her mind, she will at last give her address; in which case she makes a very serious mistake, as any lady replying to a communication of such a character, giving her name and residence to a stranger, Places herself at a great disadvantage. Should her communication never be answered, she will feel mortified ever afterwards that she committed the indiscretion of replying to the advertisement at all; and, should the person she addresses Prove to be some worthless fellow who may Presume to press an acquaintance upon the strength of her reply, it may cause her very serious perplexity and embarrassment.

she is yet unknown to the advertiser.

Great caution should be exercised in answering personals. The supposition is, if the advertiser be a gentleman, that he will honorably seek an interview with a lady, and pay court as gentlemen ordinarily do. Still, an occasion may happen to a man, who is in the highest sense a gentleman, wherein he sees the lady that he very greatly admires, and can learn her address in no other way without rendering himself offensive and impertinent; hence, the apparent necessity of the above personal advertisement.

Instances have also occurred where gentlemen, driven with business, and having but little time to mingle in female society, or no opportunity, being strangers comparatively, desirous of forming the acquaintance of ladies, have honestly advertised for correspondence, been honestly answered, and marriage was the result.

Those advertisements, however, wherein Sammy Brown and Coney Smith advertise for

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