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TO THE HONOURABLE
HOUSE OF COMMONS, &c.

THE HUMBLE PETITION OF THE FOOTMEN IN AND
ABOUT THE CITY OF DUBLIN, IN THE YEAR 1732.

HUMBLY SHEWETH,

THAT your petitioners are a great and numerous society, endowed with several privileges time out of mind. That certain lewd, idle, and disorderly persons for several months past, as it is notoriously known, have been daily seen in the public walks of this city, habited sometimes in green coats and sometimes laced, with long oaken cudgels in their hands and without swords; in hopes to procure favour by that advantage with a great number of ladies who frequent those walks; pretending and giving themselves out to be the true genuine Irish footmen; whereas they can be proved to be no better than common toupees, as a judicious eye may soon discover by their awkward, clumsy, ungenteel gait and behaviour; by their unskilfulness in dress, even with the advantage of our habits; by their ill-favoured countenances with an air of impudence and dulness peculiar to the rest of their brethren, who have not yet arrived at that transcendent pitch of assurance, and although it may be justly apprehended that they will do so in time, if these counterfeits shall happen to succeed in their evil design of passing for real footmen, thereby to render themselves more amiable to the ladies.

Your petitioners do further allege that many of the said counterfeits, upon a strict examination, have been found in the act of strutting, staring, swearing, swaggering, in a manner that plainly showed their best endeavours to imitate us. Wherein although they did not succeed, yet by their ignorant and ungainly way of copying our graces, the utmost indignity was endeavoured to be cast upon our whole profession.

Your petitioners do therefore make it their humble request that this honourable house (to many of whom your petitioners are nearly allied) will please to take this grievance into your most serious consideration; humbly submitting whether it would not be proper that certain officers might, at the public charge, be employed to search for and discover all such counterfeit footmen; to carry them before the next justice of peace, by whose warrant, upon the first conviction, they shall be stripped of their coats and oaken ornaments and be set two hours in the stocks; upon the second conviction, beside stripping, be set six hours in the stocks with a paper pinned on their breasts signifying their crime in large capital letters, and in the following words :"A. B., commonly called A. B., esq., a toupee, and a notorious impostor, who presumed to personate a true Irish footman.'

And for any other offence the said toupee shall be committed to Bridewell, whipped three times, forced to hard labour for a month, and not to be set at liberty till he shall have given sufficient security for his good

behaviour.

Your honours will please to observe with what lenity we propose to treat these enormous offenders, who have already brought such a scandal on our honourable calling that several well-meaning people have mistaken them to be of our fraternity, in diminution to that credit and diguity whereby we have supported our station, as we always did in the worst of times. And we further beg leave to remark that this was manifestly done with a seditious design to render us less capable of serving the public in any great employments, as several of our fraternity as well as our ancestors have done.

We do therefore humbly implore your honours to give necessary orders for our relief in this present exigency, and your petitioners (as in duty bound) shall ever pray, &c.

ADVICE TO THE FREEMEN OF THE CITY OF DUBLIN,

IN THE CHOICE OF A MEMBER TO REPRESENT THEM IN PARLIAMENT. 1733.

THOSE few writers who, since the death of alderman

Burton, have employed their pens in giving advice to our citizens, how they should proceed in electing a new representative for the next sessions, having laid aside their pens, I have reason to hope that all true lovers of their country in general, and particularly those who have any regard for the privileges and liberties of this great and ancient city, will think a second and a third time before they come to a final determination upon what person they resolve to fix their choice. I am told there are only two persons who set up for French], and the other [John Macarall], a gentlemanı candidates; one is the present lord mayor [Humphry of good esteem, an alderman of the city, a merchant of reputation, and possessed of a considerable office under The question is which of these two persons

the crown.

it will be most for the advantage of the city to elect? I have but little acquaintance with either, so that my inquiries will be very impartial and drawn only from the general character and situation of both.

In order to this I must offer my countrymen and fellow-citizens some reasons why I think they ought to be more than ordinarily careful at this juncture upon whom they bestow their votes.

To perform this with more clearness it may be proper to give you a short state of our unfortunate country. We consist of two parties: I do not mean popish and protestant, high and low church, episcopal and sectarians, Whig and Tory; but of those of English extraction who happen to be born in this kingdom, (whose ancestors reduced the whole nation under the obedience of the English crown,) and the gentlemen sent from the other side to possess most of the chief enlarged and strengthened by the whole power in the employments here. This latter party is very much church, the law, the army, the revenue, and the civil administration deposited in their hands; although for political ends and to save appearances, some employments are still distributed (yet gradually in a small number) to persons born here: this proceeding fortified with good words and many promises is sufficient to flatter and feed the hopes of hundreds, who will never be one farthing the better, as they might easily be convinced if they were qualified to think at all.

Civil employments of all kinds have been for several years past, with great prudence, made precarious and during pleasure; by which means the possessors are and must inevitably be for ever dependent; yet those very few of any consequence, which being dealt with so sparing a hand to persons born among us, are enough to keep hope alive in great numbers who desire to mend their condition by the favour of those in power.

Now, my dear fellow-citizens, how is it possible you can conceive that any person who holds an office of some hundred pounds a-year, which may be taken from him whenever power shall think fit, will if he should be chosen a member for any city, do the least thing when he sits in the house that he knows or fears may be displeasing to those who gave him or continue him in that office? Believe me, these are not times to expect such an exalted degree of virtue from mortal men. Blazing stars are much more frequently seen than such heroical worthies. And I could sooner hope to find 10,000. by digging in my garden than such a phoenix by searching among the present race of man

kind.

I cannot forbear thinking it a very erroneous as well

as modern maxim of politics in the English nation, to take every opportunity of depressing Ireland; whereof 100 instances may be produced in points of the highest importance, and within the memory of every middleaged man; although many of the greatest persons among that party which now prevails have formerly, upon that article, much differed in their opinion from their present successors.

But so the fact stands at present. It is plain that the court and country party here (I mean in the house of commons) very seldom agree in anything but their loyalty to his present majesty, their resolutions to make him and his viceroy easy in the government to the utmost of their power, under the present condition of the kingdom. But the persons sent from England, who (to a trifle) are possessed of the sole executive power in all its branches, with their few adherents in possession who were born here, and hundreds of expectants, hopers, and promisees, put on quite contrary notions with regard to Ireland. They count upon an universal submission to whatever shall be demanded; wherein they act safely, because none of themselves, except the candidates, feel the least of our

pressures.

I remember a person of distinction some days ago affirmed in a good deal of mixed company, and of both parties, that the gentry from England, who now enjoy our highest employments of all kinds, can never be possibly losers of one farthing by the greatest calamities that can befall this kingdom, except a plague that would sweep away a million of our hewers of wood and drawers of water, or an invasion that would fright our grandees out of the kingdom. For this person argued that, while there was a penny left in the treasury, the civil and the military list must be paid; and that the episcopal revenues, which are usually farmed out at six times below the real value, could hardly fail. He insisted further, that as money diminished, the price of all necessaries of life must of consequence do so too, which would be for the advantage of all persons in employment, as well as of my lords the bishops, and to the ruin of every body else. Among the company there wanted not men in office, besides one or two expectants; yet I did not observe any of them disposed to return an answer; but the consequences drawn were these: That the great men in power, sent hither from the other side, were by no means upon the same foot with his majesty's other subjects of Ireland. They had no common ligament to bind them with us; they suffered not with our sufferings; and if it were possible for us to have any cause of rejoicing, they could not rejoice with us.

Suppose a person born in this kingdom shall happen, by his services for the English interest, to have an employment conferred upon him worth 4007. a-year, and that he has likewise an estate in land worth 4007. a-year more, suppose him to sit in parliament, then suppose a land-tax to be brought in of 5s. a-pound for ten years, I tell you how this gentleman will compute. He has 4007. a-year in land, the tax he must pay yearly is 100, by which, in ten years, he will pay only 10001. but if he gives his vote against this tax he will lose 40007. by being turned out of his employment, together with the power and influence he has by virtue and colour of his employment, and thus the balance will be against him 30007.

I desire, my fellow-citizens, you will please to call to mind how many persons you can vouch for among your acquaintance who have so much virtue and selfdenial as to lose 4001. a-year for life, together with the smiles and favour of power, and the hopes of higher advancement, merely out of a generous love of his country.

The contentions of parties in England are very dif

VOL. II.

ferent from those among us. The battle there is fought for power and riches, and so it is indeed among us; but whether a great employment be given to Tom or to Peter, they were both born in England, the profits are to be spent there. All employments (except a very few) are bestowed on the natives, they do not send to Germany, Holland, Sweden, or Denmark, much less to Ireland, for chancellors, bishops, judges, or other officers. Their salaries, whether well or ill got, are employed at home, and whatever their morals or politics be, the nation is not the poorer.

The house of commons in England have frequently endeavoured to limit the number of members who should be allowed to have employments under the crown. Several acts have been made to that purpose, which many wise men think are not yet effectual enough, and many of them are rendered ineffectual by leaving the power of re-election. Our house of commons consists, I think, of about 300 members; if 100 of these should happen to be made up of persons already provided for, joined with expecters, compliers easy to be persuaded, such as will give a vote for a friend who is in hopes to get something; if they be merry companions, without suspicion; of a natural bashfulness, not apt or able to look forward; if good words, smiles, and caresses, have any power over them, the larger part of a second hundred may be very easily brought in at a most reasonable rate.

There is an Englishmana of no long standing among us, but in an employment of great trust, power, and profit. This excellent person did lately publish at his own expense a pamphlet printed in England by authority, to justify the bill for a general excise or inland duty, in order to introduce that blessed scheme among us. What a tender care must such an English patriot for Ireland have of our interest, if he should condescend to sit in our parliament! I will bridle my indignation. However, methinks I long to see that mortal, who would with pleasure blow us all up at a blast; but he duly receives his 1000l. a-year, makes his progress like a king, is received in pomp at every town and village where he travels, and shines in the English newspapers.

I will now apply what I have said to you, my brethren and fellow-citizens. Count upon it as a truth next to your creed, that no one person in office, of which he is master for life, whether born here or in England, will ever hazard that office for the good of his country. One of your candidates is of this kind, and I believe him to be an honest gentleman, as the word honest is generally understood; but he loves his employment better than he does you, or his country, or all the countries upon earth. Will you contribute to give him city security to pay him the value of his employment, if it should be taken from him during his life for voting on all occasions with the honest country party in the house? although I much question whether he would do it even upon that condition.

Wherefore, since there are but two candidates, I intreat you will fix on the present lord mayor. He has shown more virtue, more activity, more skill, in one year's government of the city, than a hundred years can equal. He has endeavoured with great success to banish frauds, corruptions, and all other abuses from

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and busy a station, deserves your thanks, and the best return you can make him, and you, my brethren, have no other to give him than that of representing you in parliament. Tell me not of your engagements and promises to another; your promises are sins of inconsideration at best, and you are bound to repent and annul them. That gentleman, although with good reputation, is already engaged on the other side. He has 4007. a-year under the crown, which he is too wise to part with, by sacrificing so good an establishment to the empty names of virtue, and love of his country. I can assure you the DRAPIER is in the interest of the present lord mayor, whatever you may be told to the contrary. I have lately heard him declare so in public company, and offer some of these very reasons in defence of his opinion, although he has a regard and esteem for the other gentleman, but would not hazard the good of the city and the kingdom for a compliment.

The lord mayor's severity to some unfair dealers should not turn the honest men among them against him. Whatever he did was for the advantage of those very trades, whose dishonest members he punished. He has hitherto been above temptation to act wrong, and therefore, as mankind goes, he is the most likely to act right as a representative of your city, as he constantly did in the government of it.

SOME CONSIDERATIONS

HUMBLY OFFERED TO THE RIGHT HONOURABLE THE LORD MAYOR, THE COURT OF ALDERMEN, AND COMMON COUNCIL OF THE HONOUR ABLE CITY OF DUBLIN,

IN THE CHOICE OF A RECORDER.

THE office of recorder to this city being vacant by the death of a very worthy gentleman, it is said that five or six persons are soliciting to succeed him in the employment. I am a stranger to all their persons, and to most of their characters, which latter I hope will at this time be canvassed with more decency than it sometimes happens upon the like occasions. Therefore, as I am wholly impartial, I can with more freedom deliver my thoughts how the several persons and parties concerned ought to proceed in electing a recorder for this great and ancient city.

And first, as it is very natural, so I can by no means think it an unreasonable opinion that the sons or near relations of aldermen, and other deserving citizens, should be duly regarded as proper competitors for an employment in the city's disposal, provided they be equally qualified with other candidates, and provided that such employments require no more than common abilities and common honesty. But in the choice of a recorder the case is entirely different. He ought to be a person of good abilities in his calling, of an unspotted character, an able practitioner, one who has occasionally merited of this city before; he ought to be of some maturity in years, a member of parliament, and likely to continue so, regular in his life, firm in his loyalty to the Hanover succession, indulgent to tender consciences, but at the same time a firm adherer to the established church. If he be such a one who has already sat in parliament, it ought to be inquired of what weight he was there; whether he voted on all occasions for the good of his country, and particularly for advancing the trade and freedom of this city; whether he be engaged in any faction, either national or religious; and lastly, whether he be a man

On the death of Mr. Stoyte, recorder of the city of Dublin, in the year 1733, several gentlemen declared themselves candidates to succeed him, upon which the dean wrote the above paper. E. Stannard, esq., was elected.

of courage, not to be drawn from his duty by the frowns or menaces of power, nor capable to be corrupted by allurements or bribes. These and many other particulars are of infinitely more consequence than that single circumstance of being descended by a direct or collateral line from any alderman or distinguished citizen, dead or alive.

There is not a dealer or shopkeeper in this city of any substance whose thriving, less or more, may not depend upon the good or ill conduct of a recorder. He is to watch every motion in parliament that may the least affect the freedom, trade, or welfare of it.

In this approaching election, the commons, as they are a numerous body, so they seemed to be most concerned in point of interest; and their interest ought to be most regarded, because it altogether depends upon the true interest of the city. They have no private views; and giving their votes, as I am informed, by balloting, they lay under no awe or fear of disobliging competitors. It is therefore hoped that they will duly consider which of the candidates is most likely to advance the trade of themselves and their brother citizens; to defend their liberties both in and out of parliament against all attempts of encroachment or oppression. And so God direct them in the choice of a Recorder, who may for many years supply that important office with skill, diligence, courage, and fidelity. And let all the people say, Amen.

A NEW PROPOSAL,

FOR THE BETTER REGULATION AND IMPROVEMENT OF QUADRILLE. 1736.

Ridiculum acri

Fortius et melius, &c.-HOR. 1 Sat. x. 14.

Mr. George Faulkner, a printer in Dublin, at the request of Dr. Swift, published "A new proposal for the better Regulation and Improvement of Quadrille," written by Dr. Josiah Horte, then bishop of Kilmore, afterwards archbishop of Tuam; Mr. serjeant Bettesworth, a member of the Irish parliament, made a complaint to the house of commons then sitting. They voted the printer into custody (who was confined closely in prison three days, when he was in a very bad state of health, and his life in much danger) for not disclosing the name of the author, at that time supposed to be Dr. Swift, against whom some invectives were thrown out by Mr. Bettesworth and others; which occasioned the poem of The Legion Club, and others. Dr. Horte was made bishop of Kilmore, July 27, 1727; and translated to Tuam, Jan. 27, 1741. He published a volume of Sermons, 8vo. 1738; and died in 1752. That he was the author, and Dr. Swift the editor, of this little treatise is plain from their respective letters, dated Feb. 23, 1836-7, and May 12, 1737.

WHEREAS the noble game of Quadrille hath been found by experience to be of great use and benefit to the commonwealth, particularly as it helps to kill time, that lies heavy upon our hands, and to pass away life, which seems too long while we have it, and too short when we come to part with it; as it suppresses all wit in conversation which is apt to turn into scandal, all politics which are offensive to ministries and governments, and all reading which is injurious to the eyes, especially by candle-light; and it destroys pride effectually, by bringing the noble and ignoble, the learned and ignorant, the prude and the coquette, wives, widows, and maids, to one common level; giving preference of the best place and warmest corner, not according to the fantastical distinctions of birth, quality, and station, but by equal lot; as it is a sovereign cure for animosiheartily hate one another; as it prevents the squabbles, ties, making people good friends for the time being, who so frequent among other dealers, about the weight of gold, and gives the lightest the same value and currency

with the heaviest, which is no small advantage to the public at this juncture, when change is growing so scarce; and to name no more, as it enables the butler to go as fine as his master, without an increase of wages.

And whereas, for want of true taste and relish of the said noble game, divers ladies are tardy, and come late to the rendezvous, being detained by the paltry cares of family, or a nap after dinner, or by hooking-in a few street-visits at doors where they expect to be denied, and are sometimes cruelly bit; while the true professors and adepts, who consider the shortness of human life and the value of precious time, are impatiently waiting for such loiterers, and curse innocent clocks and watches that are forced to lie in justification of their tardiness.

Now, in order to cut off those frivolous pretences, and prevent those ill-bred and injurious practices for the future, and to the intent that every lady may have due notice of the appointed hour, it is hereby proposed, that a subscription be set on foot for erecting a square tower in the middle of St. Stephen's Green, and that a bell be hung in the same, large enough to be heard distinctly over the parishes of St. Anne, St. Andrew, and St. Peter, and in calm evenings as far as the parish of St. Mary, for the benefit of the graduates dwelling there: that the said bell, for greater solemnity, shall be christened, according to the rites and ceremonies of the Roman church, and that the godfathers shall be K. C. and M. J., and the godmothers L. M. and R. E., who shall call it The Great Tom of Quadrille; that the said bell shall be tolled by the butlers of St. Stephen's Green and Dawson Street in their turns, beginning exactly a quarter before six in the evening, and ending precisely at six. In the mean time, all the little church bells shall cease their babblings, to the end Tom may be more distinctly heard.

And if, upon such legal notice, any lady of the party shall not be ready on the spot to draw for her place before the last stroke of Tom, she shall lay down 5s. on the table, by way of fine, for the use of the poor of the parish, being Protestants; or on failure thereof, she shall not handle a card that night, but Dummy shall be substituted in her room.

And that parties may not be disappointed, by excuses of a cold or other slight indispositions, when it is too late to beat up for a new recruit, it is proposed that no such excuse shall be admitted, unless the same be certified under the hand of some graduate physician, Dr. Richard Talways excepted: and for want of such certificate, the defaultress to be amerced as foresaid at the next meeting. And it is further proposed, that the said great Tom shall be tolled a quarter before eleven precisely, after which no pool shall be made, to the intent that the ladies may have a quarter of an hour for adjusting their play-purses and saying their prayers; and in the absence of the butler, who is to be the bell hour for the night, it may be lawful for a footman to snuff the candles over the ladies' shoulders, provided he be a handsome, well-dressed young fellow, with a clean shirt and ruffles.

N. B. That Tom is not to toll on Sundays, without special license from the parish minister, and this not till divine service is over.

And whereas frequent disputes and altercations arise in play between ladies of distinction, insomuch that a bystander may plainly perceive that they pull coifs in their hearts, and part with such animosity, that nothing but the sovereign reconciler Quadrille could bring them to meet again in one house; it is humbly proposed, for the benefit of trade, that when a question cannot be decided by the company, the same shall be immedi

a The bells are christened by the Papists.

ately set down in writing by the lady who can write the best English; and that the case being thereby stated, and attested by both parties, shall, together with the fee of one fish ad valorem, be laid before the renowned Mr. serjeant Buttesworth, who shall be appointed arbitrator-general in all disputes of this kind; and shall moreover have sufficient power and authority to give damages for all opprobrious language, and especially for all hints, squints, innuendoes, leers, and shrugs, or other muscular motions of evil signification, by which the reputation of a lady may be affected, on account of any slip or miscarriage that may have happened within twenty years last past.

And if any lady should find herself aggrieved by the decision of the said Mr. Bettesworth, it shall be lawful for her to remove her cause, by appeal, before the upright man in Essex-street, who, having never given a corrupt judgment, may be called, next after his holiness at Rome, the only infallible judge upon earth; and the said upright man's determination shall be final and conclusive to all parties.

And forasmuch as it appears by experience, that this beneficial branch of commerce cannot well be carried on without entries to be made in writing, which, by their great number, might occasion oversights and mistakes, without some prudent restrictions; it is humbly proposed that all appointments made for any longer time than three months to come shall be declared utterly null and void: and in case a lady should happen, upon the day prefixed within that term, to be in labour, or to be no longer than one week brought to bed; or if, for the unseasonable hours, her husband should withhold her pin-money, or chain her by the leg to the bed-post, she shall incur no penalty for her non-appearance, there being no doubt of her good inclination.

But no plea of a husband newly buried, or of weeds delayed by a mantua-maker, or any other matter of mere fashion or ceremony, shall be in anywise admitted.

And to the intent that no breach of faith may pass unpunished, it is proposed, that the lady making default shall at the next party meeting take the chair nearest the door, or against a cracked panel in the wainscot, and have no screen at her back, unless she shall give her honour that her memorandum paper was casually left in her folio Common Prayer-book at church, and that she only perused it there during the collect; in which case her punishment shall be respited till the next meeting, where she shall produce the same, and vouch it to be the true original."

And lastly, because it sometimes happens that a party is broken and a hand wanting by misnomer, and other blunders of servants carrying messages; it is proposed, that the servant so offending, if it be a valet de chambre, shall wait in a common livery for the space of one month; and if he be a footman, the booby shall be tossed in a blanket in the middle of Stephen's Green.

ADVERTISEMENT

FOR THE HONOUR OF THE KINGDOM OF IRELAND, 1739.

THIS is to inform the public, that a gentleman of long study, observation, and experience, hath employed himself for several years in making collections of facts relating to the conduct of divines, physicians, lawyers, soldiers, merchants, traders, and squires; containing an historical account of the most remarkable corruptions, frauds, oppressions, knaveries, and perjuries; wherein the names of the persons concerned shall be inserted at

full length, with some account of their families and

stations.

But whereas the said gentleman cannot complete his history without some assistance from the public, he humbly desires that all persons, who have any memoirs, or accounts, relating to themselves, their families, their friends, or acquaintance, which are well attested, and fit to enrich the work, will please to send them to the printer of this advertisement: and if any of the said persons, who are disposed to send materials, happen to live in the country, it is desired their letters may be either franked, or the post paid.

This collection is to commence with the year 1700, and to be continued to the present year, 1738. The work is to be entitled, "The Author's Critical History of his Own Times."

It is intended to be printed by subscription, in a large octavo; each volume to contain 500 facts, and to be sold for a British crown. The author proposeth that the whole work (which shall take in the period of 38 years) shall be contained in 18 volumes.

Whoever shall send the author any accounts of persons who have performed any acts of justice, charity, public spirit, gratitude, fidelity, or the like, attested by indubitable witnesses within the same period, the said facts shall be printed by way of appendix at the end of each volume, and no addition to the price of the work demanded. But, lest any such persons may apprehend that the relating of these facts may be injurious to their reputations, their names shall not be set down without particular direction.

N.B. There will be a small number printed on royal paper for the curious, at only two British crowns. There will also be the effigies of the most eminent persons mentioned in this work, prefixed to each volume, curiously engraved by Mr. Hogarth.

Subscriptions are taken in by the printer hereof, and by the booksellers of London and Dublin.

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Deanery-house, Sept. 26, 1726.

THE continued concourse of beggars from all parts of the kingdom to this city, having made it impossible for the several parishes to maintain their own poor according to the ancient laws of the land, several lord mayors did apply themselves to the lord archbishop of Dublin, that his grace would direct his clergy and his churchwardens of the said city to appoint badges of brass, copper, or pewter, to be worn by the poor of the several parishes. The badges to be marked with the initial letters of the name of each church, and numbered 1, 2, 3, &c., and to be well sewed and fastened on the right and left shoulder of the outward garment of each of the said poor, by which they might be distinguished. And that none of the said poor should go out of their own parish to beg alms; whereof the beadles were to take care.

His grace the lord archbishop did accordingly give his directions to the clergy; which, however, have proved wholly ineffectual, by the fraud, perverseness, or pride of the said poor, several of them openly protesting "they will never submit to wear the said badges." And of those who received them, almost every one keep them in their pockets, or hang them in a string about their necks, or fasten them under their coats, not to be seen, by which means the whole design is eluded; so that a man may walk from one end of the town to another without seeing one beggar regularly badged, and in such great numbers, that they are a mighty nuisance to the public, most of them being foreigners.

It is therefore proposed, that his grace the lord arch

And

bishop would please to call the clergy of the city together, and renew his directions and exhortations to them, to put the affair of badges effectually in practice, by such methods as his grace and they shall agree upon. I think it would be highly necessary that some paper should be pasted up in several proper parts of the city, signifying this order, and exhorting all people to give no alms except to those poor who are regularly badged, and only while they are in the precincts of their own parishes. And if something like this were delivered by the ministers in the reading-desk two or three Lord'sdays successively, it would still be of further use to put this matter upon a right foot. And that all who offend against this regulation be treated as vagabonds and sturdy beggars.

CONSIDERATIONS

ABOUT MAINTAINING THE POOR.

WE have been amused, for at least thirty years past, with numberless schemes, in writing and discourse, both in and out of parliament, for maintaining the poor and setting them to work, especially in this city: most of which were idle, indigested, or visionary; and all of them ineffectual, as it has plainly appeared by the conthat they drew a parallel from Holland to England, to sequences. Many of those projectors were so stupid, be settled in Ireland; that is to say, from two countries with full freedom and encouragement for trade, to a third where all kind of trade is cramped, and the most beneficial parts are entirely taken away. But the perpetual infelicity of false and foolish reasoning, as well as proceding and acting upon it, seems to be fatal to this country.

For my own part, who have much conversed with those folks who call themselves merchants, I do not remember to have met with a more ignorant and wrongthinking race of people in the very first rudiments of trade; which, however, was not so much owing to their want of capacity, as to the crazy constitution of this kingdom, where pedlers are better qualified to thrive than the wisest merchants. I could fill a volume with which this kingdom has suffered within the compass of only setting down a list of the public absurdities by my own memory, such as could not be believed of any nation, among whom folly was not established as a law. I cannot forbear instancing a few of these, because it may be of some use to those who shall have it in their power to be more cautious for the future.

The first was, the building of the barracks; whereof I have seen above one-half, and have heard enough of the rest, to affirm that the public has been cheated of at least two-thirds of the money raised for that use, by the plain fraud of the undertakers.

Another was the management of the money raised for the Palatines; when, instead of employing that great sum in purchasing lands in some remote and cheap part of the kingdom, and there planting those people as a colony, the whole end was utterly defeated.

A third is, the insurance office against fire, by which land, (a trifle, it seems, we can easily spare,) and will several thousand pounds are yearly remitted to Enggradually increase until it comes to a good national tax: might properly be written, "The Lord have mercy for the society-marks upon our houses (under which upon us!")spread faster and farther than the colony of frogs. I have, for above twenty years past, given warn

a This was the inscription placed on houses visited by the plague.

b This similitude, which is certainly the finest that could possibly have been used upon this occasion, seems to require a short explication. About the beginning of the eighteenth century, Dr. Gwythers, a physician, and fellow of the University

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