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Dr. Goldsmith and some of his friends occasion. ally dined at the St. James's Coffee-house.One day it was proposed to write epitaphs on him. His country, dialect, and person, furnished subjects of witticism. He was called on for RETALIATIỢN, and at their next meeting produced the following poem. RETALIATION:
PO E M.
OF old, when Scarron his companions invited, Each guest brought his dish, and the feast was united; If our * landlord supplies us with beef, and with fish, Let each guest bring himself, and he brings the best
dish : Our † Deanshallbe venison, just fresh from the plains; Our | Burke shall be tongue, with the garnish of
brains : Our $ Will shall be wild fowl, of excellent flavour, And || Dick with his pepper shall heighten the savour:
* The master of the St. James's coffee-house, where the doctor, and the friends he has characterized in this poem, occasionally dined.
+ Doctor Bernard, dean of Derry in Ireland. # The Right Hon. Edmund Burke.
Mr. William Burke, late secretary to General Conway, and member for Bedwin. # Mr. Richard Burke, collector of Granada.
Our * Cumberland's sweet-bread its place shall
obtain, And † Douglas is pudding, subtantial and plain : Our | Garrick's a sallad; for in him we see Oil, vinegar, sugar, and saltness agree: To make out the dinner, full certain I am, That $ Ridge is anchovy, and || Reynolds is lamb; That q Hickey's a capon, and by the same rule, Magnanimous Goldsmith, a gooseberry fool. At a dinner so various, at such a repast, Who'd not be a glutton, and stick to the last ? Here, waiter, more wine, let me sit while I'm able, Till all my companions sink under the table; Then, with chaos and blunders encircling my head, Let me ponder, and tell what I think of the dead.
Here lies the good ** Dean, reunited to earth, Who mix'd reason with pleasure, and wisdom with
* Mr. Richard Cumberland, author of the West Indian, Fashionable Lover, the Brothers, and various other productions. (a)
+ Dr. Douglas, canon of Windsor, (now Bishop of Salisbury) an ingenious Scotch gentleman, who has no less distinguished himself as a citizen of the world, than a sound critic, in detecting several literary mistakes (or rather forgeries) of his countrymen; particularly Lauder on Milton, and Bower's History of the Popee.
| David Garrick, Esq.
§ Counsellor John Ridge, a gentlemaan belonging to the Irish bar.
|| Sir Joshua Reynolds. 9 An eminent attorney. ** Vide
105. (a) Since this note was written of "Calvary, or the Death of Christ.”
If he had any faults, he has left us in doubt, ,
Here lies our good * Edmund, whose genius was
such, We scarcely can praise it, or blame it too much; Who, born for the universe, narrow'd his mind, And to party gave up what was meant for mankind. Though fraught with all learning, yet straining his
throat, To persuadet Tommy Townshend to lend himavote; Who, too deep for his hearers, still went on refining, And thought of convincing, while they thought of
dining; Though equal to all things, for all things unfit, Too nice for a statesman, too proud for a wit; For a patriot too cool; for a drudge, disobedient, And too fond of the right, to pursue the expedient.
, In short, 'twas his fate, unemploy’d, or in place, sir, To eat mutton cold, and cut blocks with a razor.
Herelieshonest | William, whose heart was a mint, While the owner ne'er knew half the good that was.
The pupil of impulse, it forc'd him along, His conduct still right, with his argument wrong ; * Vide page
105. + Mr. T. Townshend, member for Whitchurch. $ Vide page 105.