not probably seen in print for many years, if ever before. While Daniel Webster resided in Washington a member of his family heard him say what I now record, and told it in person to my friend the General.

Hayne, of South Carolina, urged on by his Southern friends, had made his speech which called forth that immortal reply of the great "Northern Lion," and many of Webster's friends, struck with Hayne's real ability, began to say half-way to each other, "Can Webster answer that?”

Mrs. Webster was present at the Capitol, and was greatly agitated at the fire and force of the hero of South Carolina. She rode home with a friend in advance of her husband. At last the "Lion" came tramping up to the door, and marched in in an easy, unconcerned way. His wife hastened into the hall just as she was, taking a pinch of snuff, and, with tears in her eyes, says to him, "Can you, can you answer Mr. Hayne?"

With a sort of grunt, or quiet roar, her lord turned upon her: "Answer him! I'll gr-i-n-d him finer than that snuff in your box!"-[A very doubtful story, the Drawer thinks.]

OUR District Attorney, says a West Virginia correspondent, being at the Swann House in Parkersburg, received a telegraphic dispatch. The message requiring an answer, he stepped over to the office to reply. Having written his answer and folded it he said,

"Please give me an envelope."

the thing, they would make him chairman. Upon being announced chairman Sol took his seat with a great deal of dignity and importance. The question read as follows: "Resolved, that the negroes have more cause of complaint than the Indians." It was stipulated that the question should be confined to the United States. The chief disputant on the affirmative opened the debate and made a speech to sustain his position, every word of which was listened to with close attention from the chairman. The disputant on the negative made a few remarks in answer, and then turned to the Bible and commenced reading passages for the purpose of proving slavery right, and by that means intending to show that the negroes had not been wronged.

Sol heard him for a short time, and then jumped up and said in a loud voice to the speaker: "Stop right where you are. Don't go any further. You have gone out of the United States for argument."

LAST year our regiment (the Sixty-seventh Ohio) was stationed on Morris Island, South Carolina. One hot day in August the agent of the Sanitary Commission informed me that he had received a cargo of ice from the good people of Boston, to be distributed among the troops, and that we could have a hundred pounds of it by sending to Lighthouse Inlet. I accordingly applied to the wagonmaster for transportation, who assigned to me a South Carolina negro of about twenty summers, with his mule and cart. Pompey had probably never seen ice thicker than window-glass, perhaps not that. The tide was out, which left the vessel high and dry on the bank. mule and cart alongside of the vessel, and a cake of ice was lowered over the side to him, which he took in his hands, but dropped it almost as quick as if it had been hot iron. Looking up, he exclaimed, "Oh, lordy massa! it must be a berry cold country where dis stuff grows!"

Pompey drove his

"My friend," said a seedy individual to a waggish acquaintance at a ferry, "I wish you would loan me two quarters to cross the ferry, I haven't got a dollar in the world."

"Well, I would like to know," was the reply, "what difference it makes to a man who hasn't got a dollar in the world which side of the river he's on?"

HERE is a good thing in relation to the poet who wrote "Hohenlinden," which possibly has not yet found its way to your columns. There was a convivial gathering at the poet's house, where the rosy wine and the sparkling jest ran far into the winter's night. The party broke up by degrees, each guest

"What for?" exclaimed the astonished operator. leaving as the spirit moved him. Just as one had "Why, mine came in an envelope!"

A NUMBER of years ago, when those who are now steady and thorough-going business-men were boys living in the town of Livonia, Livingston County, New York, they formed a debating club, which met in what is called the East School-house. Debating evenings the neighbors would call in to see what the boys were about. It was customary with the society to choose one of the spectators chairman for the evening, to hear the arguments and decide the question.

One evening a fellow by the name of Solomon T- made his appearance. He being a very knowing fellow, the boys thought, for the fun of

left the room a rumbling noise was heard on the stairway, and the body of a bright devotee to wit and Bacchus went tumbling down stairs.

"What is the matter?" said Campbell, from the doorway.

"It's I, Sir, rolling rapidly," was the ready response.

AMONG the members of the Convention which met some years ago to form the new Constitution of Kentucky was Captain John Budd, of this city (Louisville). The Convention was discussing the subject of voting at elections. The Captain, who thought the ballot dangerous to the welfare of the State and the institution of slavery, made his speech

THIS comes to the Drawer from the United States

in opposition to the change, saying, the gentlemen might talk as they pleased in favor of this new-steamer Marmora, of the Mississippi Squadron: fangled way of dropping in their sentiments as if ashamed to let them be known, but as for himself, he "was born in old Virginia, where people walk plainly on the centre of the turnpike while the sun is shining, and I am in favor of every man going boldly up to the polls and voting his honest opinions vice versa."

At White River station, the other day, among other boats at anchor there were the large sidewheel steamer St. Patrick and a very small sternwheel boat named the Mattie. The latter boat was coaling from a barge alongside of her. The St. Patrick having received orders to coal from the same barge, ran up alongside of her for that purpose, when, through the carelessness of her pilot,

A RURAL correspondent residing at Sinking instead of landing at the barge, she came in collision Springs, Ohio, writes to the Drawer:

with the little stern-wheeler, smashing her fenders A gentleman delivered a pair of "Slogy" shoes and otherwise doing her considerable damage. The to the mail-carrier, to be conveyed from this place noise brought the Captain on deck, and, surveying to Latham, a small village nine miles distant. the work of destruction, slowly raised his eyes upThere being no other mail-matter on hand the car-ward to the hurricane-deck of the St. Patrick, and rier caused the postmaster to place the shoes in the meeting those of her Captain, sung out to him, bag, to facilitate their transportation. Arriving at "Come aboard, Captain! Come aboard, if you Latham, the postmaster there was thunder-struck at want to!" the quality of the contents of Uncle Sam's mail, and perceiving a card attached to the shoes containing WHILE on deck this morning conversing with the address of the person for whom they were de-a third engineer of our boat about music, etc., I signed, he quietly placed them in the post-office re- asked him if he had ever heard "Faust;" supposceptacle to await his call. The carrier began eager-ing, of course, that every one, if they had not heard ly to demand the shoes, and to explain that it was that delightful opera, had certainly heard of it. He merely for his accommodation that they were placed answered he couldn't tell; said he was in Cincinin the mail-bag, etc. The postmaster knew his nati a few months ago, but believed he didn't play duty too well, however, to deliver the shoes prior the night that he visited "Pike's!" to the payment of the postage, amounting to a trifle more than the shoes were worth. The affair led to a correspondence with the Post-office Department, and finally resulted in the shoes being sent to the Dead-Letter Office. It is to be presumed that Uncle Sam has concluded to wear the shoes himself.

FIVE of our Philadelphia readers have taken the trouble, each of them, to cut the poetry below from the Ledger and send it to us. One of them says:

You will notice by the inclosed that the Ledger's obituary "poic" has been around again, and, I think, eclipses all his former efforts, not excepting that "superior flower-pot" of little Jacobs, which you copied in your Drawer some months since. I think the last effusion well worthy a place in the Drawer. It is certainly very gratifying to the friends of the Union to know their much-loved starry banner has so exalted a place in the regions above.

"Dear mother, I am going home;

I am not, as you think me, dead; 'Tis those on earth in darkness roam; The angels hath me to heaven led. "Hark, mother, doth hear the angels? Oh, how pretty they can sing! They call me, mother, so fare you well, I can hear the bells in heaven ring. "List, mother, and hear my story,

'Tis not a dream, but all is true;
I am with the angels up in glory,
And only waiting here for you.
"From thy lap your James hath flown;

Our Saviour spoke, I answered his call,
Saying come to yonder heavenly home,
To live with the angels one and all.
"TO MY FATHER.

"Tell my father, who is far away
Fighting the enemy in the field,
That I'll pray for him night and day:
'Tis his angel bids him never yield.

"Tell him I am living with that God;

That I have joined the angels' heavenly band. We have Washington sitting beside our Lord,

FROM Minnesota this clever one comes:

At the Democratic State Convention held in this city, in September last, Major M, of S————— County (one of the best men in the State), was appointed temporary chairman.

The Major, in returning thanks, made a very pretty little speech, in closing which he said: "He was now sixty-four years old, and had been a Democrat from his birth. He had always felt proud of the many honors conferred upon him by the glorious old Democracy through a long life, and the present was not an exception; for he truly felt, as the Bible says-It is better to be a door-keeper in heaven than to be a king in hell!"

When the laughter caused by this quotation had somewhat subsided, a brother delegate from the Major's own county asked of a city delegate who sat near him, "What did the Major say that caused so much laughter?--I did not see the joke." The quoHe didn't seem 66 tation was repeated to him. see it" much better, but replied, "Oh! that is it, is it? I thought perhaps the Major had made some mistake in quoting Scripture!"

to

AT the funeral of the lamented Harrison, in New York, a soft, wet snow-storm set it, which very soon lightened up the dismal aspect of the procession. At a halt in the military and civic cavalcade, which moved mournfully on in all the sombre drapery of a nation's woe, one of the citizen mourners took off his new hat, and wiping off the snow, with the greatest gravity and some emotion remarked, "This is too bad! My new hat will be entirely spoiled: and all for turning out at Harrison's funeral! I almost wish he hadn't died!"

A WESTERN editor sends to the Drawer the following:

The Rev. Dr. C, a profound scholar and deservedly popular minister in the United Presbyterian Church, is remarkably absent-minded. On one occasion he was moderating a meeting of the As

With the Star-Spangled Banner grasped in his hand."sembly, had called the meeting to order after a re-,

cess, and sat down while the Clerk was calling the roll. It was somewhat tedious, and the Doctor had a capital opportunity to ramble off in one of his interminable reveries. He was aroused by the lull in the proceedings that followed the completion of this 'part of the Clerk's duty, and jerking off his spectacles he walked forward to the front of the stage, and, with a decorous gravity becoming his position, said, "The Assembly has heard the motion. All in favor will show their assent by saying 'Aye!'" Instead of saying "Aye," the Assembly burst into a regular storm of laughter, and it took the good Doctor several moments to comprehend the real status of affairs, when he retreated to his chair in confusion, perhaps with a determination to keep his thoughts at home during the rest of the session.

THE Doctor was always in the habit of depending upon his wife to keep his personal effects together. She was expected.to find his hat and cane when he went out, and to know where to lay her hand on any books or papers that he might want. At a meeting of Synod, one time, the Doctor mislaid a memorial which he was to have presented, and when the time came for its presentation it could not be found. The clerk searched for it, the ministerial brethren looked in every possible and impossible place, and the Doctor himself rummaged over the table and through, his pockets in frantic desperation. Finally he upset the gravity of the Synod completely by turning about and exclaiming, in quick, sharp tones, "Susan, Susan! what has become of that paper?" Susan was not there to reply, but there was no lack of friends to laugh.

Two or three days after B arrived, and immediately called on the Judge, when occurred what followeth :

SENATOR B. "You're a pretty man to leave a fellow that way, fifteen miles from home, ain't you?"

JUDGE J. "Why B, what's the matter?" B. "What's the matter! Sure enough I have a good will to thrash you!"

J. "Why B, what's the-I-I-don't understand?"

B. "Don't understand, eh? As though leaving me at the Half-way House wasn't enough, but you must send back by D-'to inquire if you hadn't left something!' and now make strange, as though you didn't know it!"

J. "Ha! ha! ha! That's it! I knew there was something wrong! I told D- I had left something, but couldn't think what. Tried to remember all the way home. Asked my wife what was missing when I got home. Have thought of it ever since, and could make nothing of it; and sure enough it was you! Ha! ha! ha! Sorry, 'pon my soul! Let's drink."

And they did drink.

AND still another:

In this State we have a very eminent lawyer, who is a noted wag, a great genius, and withal does become "funny" occasionally.

The Supreme Court was in session at St. Paul, and their "Honors" had taken their seats and the court was opened and business was in progress.

Our legal friend was standing outside of and leaning against the bar, conversing with another memFROM one of our numerous Western contributors ber, and did not observe that the court had been we have the following: called to order, therefore continued his conversation, when "tap, tap, tap," sounds the marshal's hammer as a warning. But being somewhat "exhilarated," and very much engaged, the distinguish

his conversation. "Rap, rap, rap," goes the hammer, but still unheeded; and the warning is repeated again and again, but uselessly. At last the Chief Justice interrupts business with, "Mr. Marshal, the conversation carried on outside the bar is annoying, and must be suspended." This was said sufficiently loud for the hearing of our legal luminary; and he did hear it, and "took in" the whole

An incident related in a recent Drawer reminds me of another of the same sort. There lives in Wisconsin a certain Judge J—, who is noted for his learning, ability, and for being remarkably ab-ed member does not hear the call, but proceeds with sent-minded when intoxicated to a certain degree. Judge J and Senator B had been on a visit to Madison on some political errand, and had both become somewhat "blue" when they started for home-a distance of about thirty miles. The two friends lived in the same town, had gone to Madison together in the same buggy, and were to return together, and did start home in the company of each other about one o'clock P.M. At the "Half-position at a glance. With a comical squint and a way House" they stopped to take a drink, of course, and Senator B alighted to procure the "redeye," while the Judge remained in the buggy. In due time the Senator returned with decanter and tumbler, and the two drank, and B-returned to deliver the "implements" to mine host. B-deposited the tumbler and decanter, paid for the "exhilarator," then called for a cigar, and proceeded to light the same. Meantime the Judge, having taken his drink, sat quietly for the space of a minute, and, forgetting that he was waiting for B, started up the team at a 2.40 rate, and was off.

After driving about five miles he met a friend going to Madison, whom he hailed as follows:

"I say, D, just stop at the Half-way House and ask the landlord if I left any thing there. It seems to me I came away and forgot something, and I have been trying to think for an hour what it is, but I can't; so just stop, won't you, and inquire, and if I left any thing just bring it out when you come back."

Dagreed, and the Judge drove home.

roll of his head in the direction of the court, he remarked to his friend, in a tone audible to the whole house,

"I say, N, those fellows up there think I'm drunk, and as that is in some sense a mixed question of law and fact, of course I will not find fault with a decision of the Court; but, between you and me, the fact is, that what is only occasional with me is habitual with them. About the legal conclusion I say nothing."

"Even the Court" smiled, and business proceeded as usual.

Two gentlemen "of the old school," who lived in Kennebec County, down in Maine, years ago, named Perley and Wood, amused themselves one evening in writing epitaphs on each other. Perley perpetrated the following on Wood:

"Here lies one Wood, inclosed in wood-
One Wood within another;

The outer wood is very good --
We can not praise the other!"

COUNSEL. "Did not the plaintiff find fault with eral commanding the brigade in which was his regthem ?"

COUNSEL. "She had another set made by anoth- somewhat unwell, and that the Major, he thought, er dentist, did she not ?"

AN EFFECTUAL DISGUISE.

CAPTAIN." What! Rhubarb, Doctor? I can't stand the taste of that."

DOCTOR.-"Um' Well, I'll tell you what we'll do. We'll disguise it in a little Castor Oil."

270

BEWARE OF THE DOG.
AUGUSTUS.-"Don't go near that nasty Dog. He's got Fleas, I know by his looks!"