“ The girl is straight,” (“ we call the ace,")
“ But that's the merit of her stays."
“ I'm sure I loath malicious hints

. But-only look, how Laura squints." “ Yet Miss, forsooth,"--"' who play'd the ten?") “ Is quite perfection with the men; .. The flattering fools--they make me sick,"'. (“ Well-four by honours, and the trick."). S

While thus the crones hold high debate,
On Laura's charms, and Laura's fate; ..!
A few short years have roll'd along,
And first in pleasure's idle throng,
Laura, in ripen'd beauty proud,
Smiles haughty on the flattering crowd;
Her sex's envy-fashion's boast,
An heiress--and a reigning toast.

The circling waltz and gay quadrille
Are in, or out, at Laura's will;
The tragic bard, and comic wit, i
Heed not the critic in the pit, .
If Laura's undisputed sway
Ordains full houses to the play;
And fair ones, of a humbler fate,
That envy, while they imitate,
From Laura'a whisper strive to guess
The changes of inconstant dress. ·
Where'er her step in beauty moves,
Around her fly a thousand loves ;
A thousand graces go before,
While striplings wonder and adore:
And some are wounded by a sigh,
Some by the lustre of her eye ;
And these her studied smiles ensnare,
And those the ringlets of her hair.

The first his futtering heart to lose;.'!" Was Captain Piercy, of the Blues; lirin He squeez'd her hand-he gaz'd, and swore » He never was in love before; .. vi. He entertain’d his charmer's ear, a

i With tales of wonder and of fear'; . :. Talk'd much, and long, of-siege and fight, i Marches by day, alarms by night; ' : :" And Laura listen'd to the story, Whether it spoke of love or glory;'" ,,!!! For many an anecdote had he, sign . Of combat, and of gallantry; * ijodii. Of long blockades, and sharp attacks, ---! : Of bullets, and of bivouacks'; 1.41.is: ' Of towns o’ercome--and ladies too . i . Of billet-and of billet-doux' ;- " S Of nunneries, and escalades, "P.. And damsels--and Damascus blades.

Alas! too soon the Captain found is.' How swiftly Fortune's wheel goes round; Laura at last began to doze, Een in the midst of Badajoz; ; ini : And hurried to a game at loo, : From Wellington and Waterloo. , ,.:? The hero,-in heroics left . B

: Of fortune--and a wife--bereft; With nought to cheer his close of day, ; ! But celibacy--and half-pay;"> D Since Laura-and his stars were cruel,' ; . Sought his quietus in a duel."

He fought, and perish'd; Laura sigh’d, s,
To hear how hapless Piercy died; "
And wip'd her eyes, and thus exprest .
The feelings of her tender breast :-

“What? dead spoor fellow-what'a pity! He was so handsome and so witty; indo Shot in a duel too good gracious.....! How I did hate that man's mustachios !" ?

Next came the interesting beau, . .' The trifling youth-Frivolio ; .. He came to see and to be seen, : Grace and good-breeding in his mien ; : : Shone all Delcroix upon his head, The West End spoke in all he said; .. And in his neckcloth's studied fold,, Sat Fashion, on a throne of gold... i He came, impatient to resign s.r. What heart he had, at Laura's shrine ::. Though deep in self-conceit encas’d,:. " He learnt to bow to Laura's taste; ::. Consulted her on new quadrilles, .si . Spot waistcoats, lavender, and gills; As will’d the proud and fickle fair, He tied his cloth, and curl'd his hair; ". Varied his manners--or his clothes, .'";s: And chang'd his tailor-or his oaths.'i..

Oh! how did Laura love to vex The fair one of the other sex! For him she practised every arti That captivates and plagues the heart. Did he bring tickets for the play? No-Laura had the spleen to-day.' . " Did he escort her to the ball ? No-Laura would'nt dance at all. in to Did he look grave ?_" the fool was sad;" , Was he jocose ?_" the man was mad.” E’en when he knelt before her feet,. . And there, in accent soft and sweet,

Laid rank and fortune, heart and hand, .?
At Laura's absolute command, . :
Instead of blushing her consent,
She “wonder'd what the blockhead meant."

Yet still the fashionable fool ... : ?
Was proud of Laura's ridicule ;
Though still despised, he still pursued,"
In ostentatious servitude,
Seeming, like lady's lap-dog, vainid :
Of being led by Beauty's chain. -o-onde en
He knelt, he gaz'd, he sigh’d, and swore, : '
While 'twas the fashion to adore ; sisse?
When years had past, and Laura's frown: ?:
Had ceas'd to terrify the town, om v
He hurried from the fallen grace, ..
To idolize a newer face ;....
Constant to nothing was the ass,
Save to his follies--and his glass.

sido soboto M em. A
The next to gain the beauty's ear...
Was William Lisle, the sonneteer,
Well deem'd the prince of rhyme and blank;
For long and deeply has he drank
Of Helicon's poetic tide,
Where nonsense flows, and numbers glide; }
And slumber'd on the herbage green,
That decks the banks of Hippocrene.
In short—his very footmen know it .
William is mad--or else a poet*

He came--and rhym'd—he talk'd of fountains, Of Pindus, and Pierian mountains ;

Of wandering lambs, of gurgling rills, · And roses, and Castalian hills;

He thought a lover's vow grew.sweeter,
When it meander'd into metre;
And planted every speech with flowers,
Fresh blooming from Aonian bowers.

“ Laura-I perish for your sake," (Here he digress'd about a lake ;) “ The charms thy features all disclose," (A simile about a rose ;) “ Have set my very soul on fire,” (An episode about his lyre;) “Though you despise I still must love," (Something about a turtle dove ;) “ Alas! in death's unstartled sleep,”(Just here he did his best to weep ;) “ Laura, the willow soon shall wave, Over thy lover's lowly grave." . Then he began, with pathos due, To speak of cypress and of rue : But Fortune's unforeseen award Parted the Beauty from the Bard; For Laura, in that evil hour When unpropitious stars had power, Unmindful of the thanks she owed, Lighted her taper with an ode. Poor William all his vows forgot, And hurried from the fatal spot, In all the bitterness of quarrel, To write lampoons and dream of laurel.

Years fleeted by, and every grace Began to fade from Laura's face; Through every circle whispers ran, And aged dowagers began